The Nonexistent Blog

in which I amend the long absence of posts...

2012-01-26T17:58:00.000-08:00

so as you might have noticed...or not, but it's all the same to me....I haven't posted on here in quite some time. God has thrown my life some of the biggest changes I've ever had and I've been busy with enough other things that I've sadly neglected my blog for awhile. But with myself and my family having moved, settled in (mostly) and all that I'm now getting around to it again :) Anyway I decided that the first thing I would do is post some more pictures of Ari! Because the pictures in this post don't do him justice. They were taken on a cold, rainy day standing under an umbrella, and poor Ari was wet and worried. So these I think (and most certainly hope) you find to be nicer! enjoy!

Goofy pictures first...

general running around

his "cutting horse" corner series...

he is very photogenic!

my adorable boy...

They're Children...

2011-06-18T05:10:00.000-07:00

(I wrote this piece a couple days ago while I was a counselor at a camp I have worked at for many years...that is primarily for the children of inmates. It's a Bible camp, and a wonderful place (sagradabiblecamp.org). But this piece started coming to me as I heard the stories of these children...terrible things (everyday life to them) and some of them are just eight or nine years old. Anyway, it's pretty much a poem, but kinda a rough cut one that's almost just rhythmic sort of speaking. But I just left it as it came...)

They’re children...

and your heart tells you

they should be full of innocence

but their eyes testify it’s not true

the burdens they carry

are great than any

we ever bore at that age

the pains of the world,

the breaks, fears and terrors

have exposed these lives

to all of mankind’s errors

my heart cries for them

and longs to heal their pain

but the truth must sink in

once the damage-it remains

the scars are deep and sharp

and worn from time again

and in their minds

the memories are stark…

where do you begin?

but look deep into their souls

search close and you will see

there are sparks of light still left

so much that they could be

there’s hope, there’s a chance

don’t give up on them now

Christ’s arms are open

and He’s waiting patiently

He might use us for a mouthpiece

and place us where we should be

nothing in our own strength

will ever fix a thing

but the power of God behind us

is of an unstoppable King

He works in mighty ways

breaks their so many bars and chains

but even so He holds them gently

and softly calls their name

He takes away their pain

the raw and burning shame

the truth has shown the way

and light is pouring in

the broken, fragmented pieces

are reforged…

they’re made brand new

how can we sit by

and let minutes still tick on

when He’s ready to show His love

and chose to right their wrong

it’s so good, so pure and beautiful

a sight worth much to see

how His truth and gracious promise

has set these new lives free

Jumping...good and bad...mostly good!

2011-05-06T17:00:00.000-07:00

We did a jumping clinic in mid-March at Lost Springs Farm. (where I work) It was fantastic, I learned a whole TON of new stuff...and Jess got some great pictures =) So here ya go:

Here is my lovely Symphony (ok, not mine, but I'm her sole rider and she's almost like mine)

trot poles for rhythm and balance

isn't she a handsome mare?! =)

and we hadn't jumped much in the last several months but she was great

and gosh is she cute! (don't look at my form, but her's is great!)

she's got so much potential! But we're working on quality before height

fantastic jump! Woohoo!

and here are some of Allspice (Spice). I don't have many good ones of her, and she had just begun jumping a few months before. But she is now doing automatic flying lead changes and jumping closer and closer to 3', so I love working with her!

our big Appendix Quarter girl

she was a Western Pleasure horse and we've had
to work hard trying to pick up her front end

this is how NOT to jump

still learning to go to the part of the jump that I told her to!

working on taking off correctly as well

and a very beautiful jump as the finale!

you are Mine...

2011-03-14T13:04:00.000-07:00

I can find you in a million faces
see you in the darkest room
find you when you think you’re hidden
and when the light shines through
because I Am
and you are Mine

when you stumble and you fall down
scraped and torn and bruised
I am here and reaching out My hand
to someone broken and confused
because I Am
and you are Mine

you must trust Me that I’ll hold you up
that I am your strength and shield
your pride and self you must give up
if to My way you will yield
because I Am
and you are Mine

the plans and dreams that are all your own
you’ve laid before Me now
said you wanted to do My will
asked Me please to show you how
because I Am
and you are Mine

days of pain and days of glory will flit
before your wondering eyes
I will guide and teach and show you
how to fight the world’s lies
because I Am
and you are Mine

I’m here in your confusion and loss
when you can’t see your way through
I hold you when you’re tempest tossed
and don’t know what to do
because I Am
and you are Mine

I am your constant source of hope
still you at times forget I’m here
but my promises never die
and I’ll wait ‘till you draw near
because I Am
and you are Mine

I hear your prayers and I feel your pains
understand the struggles that you find
know great loss and desolation
beyond thought by your mind
because I Am
and you are Mine

so I can comfort and uphold you
when the world’s falling down
because I walked for a time among you
for you I bore My Father’s frown
because I Am
and you are Mine

find in Me your joy and life of rest
assurance that I care for My own
always to Me you can return
I’ll not leave you alone
because I Am
and you are Mine

My heart breaks when you won’t see Me
but when you repent and turn
know that you’re forgiven and loved
I am steadfast, you have yet to learn
because I Am
and you are Mine

your heart will fill with purpose and hope
when you take to heart My truth
and know that I am for you
since the days of your youth
because I Am
and you are Mine

so even when you’re unsure and fear
I never change or vary
then place yourself in My hand
let me your burdens carry
because I Am
and you are Mine

I can find you in a million faces
see you in the darkest room
find you when you think you’re hidden
and when the light shines through
because I Am
and you are Mine

-written by Heather

Our Missouri Blizzard!

2011-02-01T18:33:00.001-08:00

Yay! We had fun today. We decided to go out and take pictures, though we weren't out for long because it was very tiring post holing through all the snow and because the wind stung your face. But it was a fun adventure!

Greg is 6' tall, and this drift is above his knees

standing beside the car

the snow is deeper than Schae...but he loves it!

Deep sculpted drifts

Lovely sculpted drifts!

Deep drift, with goofy dogs

snow IN the barn!

shoveling the roof

Beautiful drifts!

The blizzard! =)

To A Young Lady...

2011-01-29T16:25:00.000-08:00

I ran across this poem, and I consider it to be very beautiful. But I also consider it a challenge, for I know that I do not live up to that standard of young womanhood. So I wanted to share this with anyone who may yet read this blog, as a challenge to all young women out there that we might all strive to be worthy of the tribute given in this poem, and we might strive to be the most honorable, wholesome, and God-glorifying people that we are able. We will never be perfect, but we must still strive for greater character

To A Young Lady
Sweet stream that winds through yonder glade,
Apt emblem of a virtuous maid
Silent and chaste she steals along,
Far from the world's gay busy throng:
With gentle yet prevailing force,
Intent upon her destined course;
Graceful and useful in all she does,
Blessing and blest where'er she goes;
Pure-bosom'd as that water glass,
And heaven reflected in her face.
-William Cowper

Individual Discouragement and Personal Growth

2010-10-26T18:37:00.000-07:00

Moses saw the oppression of his people and felt certain that he was the one to deliver them, and in the righteous indignation of his own spirit he started to right their wrongs. After he launched his first strike for God and for what was right, God allowed Moses to be driven into empty discouragement, sending him into the desert to feed sheep for forty years. At the end of that time, God appeared to Moses and said to him "'...bring My people...out of Egypt.' But Moses said to God, 'Who am I that I should go...?'" (Exodus 3:10-11) In the beginning Moses had realized that he was the one to deliver the people, but he had to be trained and disciplined by God first. He was right in his individual perspective, but he was not the person for the work until he had learned true fellowship and oneness with God.
We may have the vision of God and a very clear understanding of what God wants, and yet when we start to do it, there comes to us something equivalent to Moses' forty years in the wilderness. It's as if God had ignored the entire thing, and when we are thoroughly discouraged, God comes back and revives His call to us. and then we begin to tremble and say, "Whom am I that I should go...?" We must learn that God's great stride is summed up in these words--"I AM WHO I AM...has sent me to you" (Exodus 3:14) We must also learn that our individual effort for God shows nothing but disrespect for Him--our individuality is to be rendered radiant through a personal relationship with God, so that He may be "well pleased" (Matthew 3:17) We are focused on the right individual perspective of things; we have the vision and can say, "I know this is what God wants me to do." But we have not yet learned to get into God's stride. If you are going through a time of discouragement, there is a time of great personal growth ahead.

taken from My Utmost for His Highest Oct. 15

Going Through Spiritual Confusion

2010-10-17T17:29:00.000-07:00

"Jesus answered and said, 'you do not know what you ask.'" -Matthew 20:22

There are times in your spiritual life when there is confusion, and the way out of it is not simply to say that you should not be confused. It is not a matter of right and wrong, but a matter of God taking you through a way that you temporarily do not understand. And it is only by going through the spiritual confusion that you will come to the understanding of what God wants for you.
The Shrouding of His Friendship (see Luke 11:5-8). Jesus gave the illustration here of a man who appears not to care for his friend. He was saying, in effect, that is how the heavenly Father will appear to you at times. You will think that He is an unkind friend, but remember--He is not. The time will come when everything will be explained. There seems to be a cloud on the friendship of the heart, and often even love itself has to wait in pain and tears for the blessing of fuller fellowship and oneness. When God appears to be completely shrouded, will you hang on with confidence in Him?
The Shadow on His Fatherhood (see Luke 11:11-13). Jesus said that there are times when your Father will appear as if He were an unnatural father--as if He were callous and indifferent--but remember, He is not. "Everyone who asks receives..." (Luke 11:10). If all you see is a shadow on the face of the Father right now, hang on to the fact that He will ultimately give you clear understanding and will fully justify Himself in everything that He has allowed into your life.
The Strangeness of His Faithfulness (see Luke 18:1-8). "When the Son of Man comes, will He really find faith on the earth?" (Luke 18:8). Will He find the kind of faith that counts on Him in spite of the confusion? Stand firm in faith, believing that what Jesus said is true, although in the meantime you do not understand what God is doing. He often has bigger issues at stake than the particular things you are asking of Him right now.

taken from My Utmost for His Highest, Sept. 12

Ten little monkeys...

2010-10-17T17:14:00.000-07:00

I ran across this poem early this evening. Monica and I (with some help from Greg) made it up a few years ago. It's silly, but I hope it gives you a laugh!

There's ten little monkeys
That's quite the gentlemen
But one helped the wrong person
And there went monkey ten

They went into a restaurant
'Cause it was time to dine
One ate too much sushi
And there went monkey nine

Mama bought a tiger
And forgot to buy it's mate
The tiger then got angry
And there went monkey eight

Mama baked some bread
Forgot to add the leaven
The little monkeys ate it
And there went monkey seven

Monkeys got a magic book
And tried to do some tricks
One caused himself to vanish
And there went monkey six

The monkeys all grew up
Mama taught them how to drive
But they crashed into a semi
And there went monkey five

The monkeys tried some back flips
They got a little sore
One was too ambitious
And there went monkey four

The monkeys all went to the beach
But they had to pay a fee
They forgot the checkbook
So there went monkey three

A single pair of monkeys
Visited the zoo
One was confiscated
And there went monkey two

A solitary monkey
Tried to lift a ton
He only got it started
Alas poor monkey one...

Amurath Sunrise aka "Sunny" or "Ari"

2010-09-16T08:55:00.000-07:00

Hey Everybody! Guess what?! I got a horse! Yup, he's a little (well, big) Arabian yearling! Bright chestnut, four white socks, and a star stripe snip on his face! He's really sweet, big and pretty, and very athletic! At just over a year old he is 14.1 hh! (For non-horse people that is 14 hands, 1 inch. Each hand is 4 inches, so he is roughly 4'8" at the shoulder, big for an Arab that young!) I'm so very excited to have him, and be able to train him up myself! Here are pictures!!

Friday, July 30th, 2010

2010-09-03T07:12:00.000-07:00

I got up at 4:00 a.m. FL time, which, for anyone who wonders is 3:00 a.m. back home! Very short night's sleep! As it turns out Logan, Hilary and Hannah got up even earlier because they wanted to go to IHOP for "breakfast". Marty took them, and they did end up buying a homeless guy some breakfast. From there we drove to Hertz to drop off our cars. The Hertz bus took us to the airport. The check-in was pretty long. Everyone had to be signed in and then confirm their information, then the gal behind the counter would print off each person's tags for their luggage. On our way to our terminal those of us who didn't eat at IHOP got stuff from Starbucks. I got to try a smoothie, but there was too much banana in it. (McDonald's has way better smoothies) and I got a cheese danish. We had to wait for a pretty long time before boarding...I almost fell asleep, but couldn't quite because it was really chilly. Logan got excited as we were boarding the plane because they had the little TVs in the back of the headrests, but the flight attendant had to inform him that there was a malfunction so they didn't work right now. We each got a pair of cheap earbuds though. I was tired enough that I slept most of this flight. When not asleep I journaled or watched out the window. Our layover was in Houston, TX this time. That was cool for me since Houston is my home town. We flew into Houston Intercontinental Airport. We then had to take a small train over to our terminal! Upon having reached it, and discovering that it was quite crowded Dorene and Bethany waited there and we went back a ways to the food court area. I just snacked on some of my beef jerky, but since it was about 8:30 (our time) the others decided they were hungry enough to eat again, so they got donuts and milk. We got back over to the terminal just about time to start loading. This plane was really small...well not as small as the DC-3s, but not too much bigger. There was a row of single seats on one side, and just double seats on the other. We were in the very back of the plane, but once again right near the wings. We kinda had this thing the whole trip of getting seats on or right behind the wings. We had a long wait at the runway before take-off. I enjoyed it because from where I was sitting I could see the line of jets in front of us and watch each of them take off. There was another runway to the left of us that I watched too. I never knew that there were that many planes at a time waiting to take off, and they were all different sizes. All of the commercial planes we flew in had a magazine in the seat back called Sky Mall. The young gang got a big kick out of looking through those magazines, exclaiming over the ridiculous items, and deciding which ones we would use to decorate our homes, etc. when we were rich and grown up. I do believe those magazines are designed as 'the things you can get people who already have everything'!!! (if you're interested you can visit skymall.com and see all the stuff :P) We played an A-Z movie titles game, and then one with popular actors. I'm pretty sure I knew less of the names than the others did. Anyway I did get excited on this trip since we were getting so near to home. When we arrived in Kansas City and fetched our luggage we waited until we got a call from Pastor Bowen that he was ready to pick us up. The first thing I noticed when we went outside was how humid it was. Ugh. It had been hot in Haiti, but the humidity coming home was much worse. On the way back we had a discussion about what food everybody wanted to eat first thing coming home. Most of them said ice cream or a hamburger...I wanted a good fresh salad. Yum. We stopped at a Wendy's in a far suburb of KC to eat lunch. I got a salad, and a root beer float. While we were waiting for our food a guy in line behind us commented on Logan's fish necklace. He encouraged him for wearing it and said he was doing a great job. The guy had a reflective vest on and looked like he'd been doing some sort of outdoor work. We thought, oh that's nice, and thought that was the end of it. Anyway after lunch we headed on home. We got to the church at about 2:30 in the afternoon. Greg was at the church working on the movie. (a project of his and Monica's) So I got to wish him a late happy birthday and then hung out talking with him waiting for Mom to come pick us up. Brothers are the coolest! I guess it was a good thing I slept on the way back because we celebrated Greg's birthday when I got home. So that was our trip! An amazing time and a great blessing and eye opener for me.

But, an end note. On Sunday morning Pastor Bowen came to us to share a story. Apparently after our return on Friday the church received a call from a guy in KC. It was the man at Wendy's. The man was a Christian but had been struggling lately, and that morning had gotten into a quarrel with one of the guys at his work. He left for lunch angry, but when he went to lunch he saw a group of three adults w/ several young people. One of the young men was wearing a fish necklace that said 'Jesus' and the guy assumed that it was a church youth group. He proceeded to observe that group while he was eating lunch and was very encouraged but the way the group interacted and enjoyed each other. In fact his was so blessed by the witness of the group that when he returned to work that day he apologized to his co-worker and tried to make amends. He had gotten the information off the side of the church bus and called to let us know the impact we'd had on him and he thanked us. Little did we know, that eating at a fast food restaurant on the way back from Haiti would influence another person that much! We often never know who is watching us...

Thursday, July 29th, 2010

2010-08-30T18:36:00.000-07:00

Greg's birthday. I wish I could be there to wish Togo happy birthday in person. We had cereal for breakfast, and coffee of course. We've had coffee every day! The coffee is so good! I guess it's a good thing that we don't drink coffee at home, or I'd probably drink too much when I get back. Oh, we went on a walk at 6:15 again. It was the same group except we traded Logan for Bethany. On the way back a guy named Donald joined us and walked with us most of the way through town. He talked with Marty quite a bit, and he told us that he knew the Campbell's and the other missionaries in town. I guess he did, because he was in the send off group at the airport that afternoon! The morning we spent in a bit of packing and then mostly with the kids. Jesse and Logan went to town to get machetes and vanilla for everyone. (people place 'orders' before they leave!) Jimmy became especially attached to me. He wouldn't hardly leave my side all morning. Otenel, on the other hand, kept running away and being ornery. A lot of the girls got really moody. Benji just sat around, but Galaan and Rosie wanted me to hold them. Mariilyn stayed with Hannah much of the time. Most of the middle aged boys were kinda teasing or held back. Wesley sat off to the side of the porch, Ronald sat with the much on the porch but wouldn't say much, and Davenel just sat off under a tree. He drew me a picture though. It was a big beetle and flowers (the beetle he draw from a rubber one the kids had played with all week). He's a pretty good artist. Hilary had the kids sign a shirt for her and Davenel drew flowers on the front. For lunch we had macaroni and cheese, fresh mango, and citron/orange juice. It was my last taste of the fresh Haitian juice. (that I keep raving about!) After lunch we loaded the truck and said good-bye. I gave all the nurses hugs and they seemed sad to see me go, I'd had such a good time singing with them. I gave hugs to the older girls too. Lulu, Rosie, Dauline, Francois, Galeen, Galaan and the other little girls let me hug them, but the middle aged girls held back. We went over to the boys' dorm to say good-bye too. Jimmy, Jackinson and Otenel were climbing trees and didn't want to say good-bye. Wesley and Friko came over to see us but you could tell they were sad. Davenel said good-bye and then left, Ronald was really reluctant to say anything. Jennifer, Bill, Jesse and Benji went with us to the airport. The kids waved good-bye but they were subdued as we left. The saddest thing to see though was that Davenel was sitting by the boys' dorm wiping his eyes... Both the working MFI planes came into Pignon that day. The first, the one on which we had arrived, dropped off another team associated with the seven who came with us, and then left. The second one came about twenty minutes later and took us and the team that came with us on board. I got to hold Benji for awhile while at the airport and I didn't want to let her go. Good-byes were hard for me. I didn't actually cry, but I did tear up two or three times. Our team had to hurry boarding so that we could take off in time to reach Ft. Pierce before customs closed. We landed in Cape Haitian to clear customs leaving Haiti. Leaving there we were supposed to have 18 people. Somehow, whether the guy didn't show up or the pilots just forgot him, we left a guy behind! It was a Haitian guy in a group going to FL. I slept quite a lot going home. I was feeling sad and suddenly more tired than I had been (probably because everything was over and there was no extra adrenaline) We did play cards part of the way too, just sat in a circle on the floor of the plane! There was some glorious sand marbling in and around the Exuma Cays and Nassau. I took some pictures with Hannah's camera and I'm hoping they came out nicely. We made it to Ft. Pierce about 10-15 minutes before customs closed. Walking into the airport was kind of a shocker....because there was A/C! It was cold in there. It was pretty to see the reactions to all the bags with machetes and vanilla in them...there was no surprise! Apparently those are the two most popular items brought back. It was really cool watching the scanners when all our bags went rhough. There were different colors for different types of materials. Our Hertz cars were Nissan Altimas. They were quite comfortable. It was a funny mix of new and old though. There was a key, but just the fob, no metal part. If you had it near the car then you pushed a button on the dashboard and that started the car. There was no key hole! But at the same time the seats were all manual adjustment, no buttons. The first thing that struck me as really being home and not in Haiti anymore, besides the A/C, was driving by a field with two horses in it. I said, "horses," and in my mind I thought, "wow, I just saw real horses." Then it struck me what an odd thought that was. The horses in Haiti were real, just not like the ones I was used to seeing. The drive to West Palm Beach was fun. I was Marty's navigator and Hannah was also with us. We listen to the radio and I heard some songs that were new to me. (Quite amusing to Hannah and Marty who knew them well) Ain't No Woman Like the One I Got, Don't Stop Believing, Calling All Angels, and maybe another one. We stayed at a Best Western. After arriving at the motel we took off to get gas and find a place to eat dinner. At the gas station the guy inside suggested the Mexican restaurant across the way. We got there just at closing, but they told us to come in anyway. It was authentic! The sings were all in Spanish, the menu was in Spanish (w/ English on the side :P) and to Logan, Hannah and Hilary's great amusement there was a soap opera on TV...in Spanish! I got a BBQ goat torta. (I'm telling you, I love goat) It was a really big sandwich though. We all had plenty to eat (but Logan and Hannah had to go next door and try the homemade ice cream) After that Marty, Dorene and I scouted out our route to Hertz for the next morning. Turns out it was just three or four miles down the same road we were on...so that was cool. Back at the hotel most of the girls decided to take long showers. Having taken one that morning I went straight to bed! =)

Wednesday, July 28th, 2010

2010-08-27T19:20:00.000-07:00

I got up at 6:30 and hung out at the table talking to Jennifer, Chris, Bailey and Dorene. (I don't remember if I mentioned Chris and Bailey already. They came with their dads and were going to stay for about a month. The cool thing was that they came from James River Baptist Church. It's a church in Mo about two hours from us! How ironic is that? We travel part way across the world to another country and meet there some people who live just a couple hours from us!) Marty made us pancakes for breakfast. (Jodi mixed them from scratch) Then we set up for clinic and our craft. We put our craft table by the boys dorm on the cement pad. Chris and his dad had put up a basketball hoop the night before, but Jesse accidentally pulled it down! Oops. After clinic Jennifer said we would feed the people: mothers, kids, siblings, some men, all told would be between 150-200 people. The people came about 8:00 and sat on benches by the clinic building. We washed everyone's feet. That was so cool! We used basins and actually washed with soap and then dried them. The guys were done by Logan and Marty. The callouses on some of the women's feet were unbelievably thick! A lot of them were so thick and dry that they were cracked at the heels. It was such a humbling and honoring experience. I can't explain why it was, but I was so blessed in such an amazing way by doing it. We loved doing the kids feet too. They babies' feet were soooo little and so soft. We had to dump the water after each set of feet 'cause they were so dirty. We used between 60-70 gallons of water. Pastor Clebert also did a devotion with our Haitian tracts and explained the foot washing. After the women had been through the clinic then they came to the craft table where we gave them a bag with two strips of cloth and them them weave the cloth through holes in the bag. I ended up with Friko's ballcap at one point so I just wore it at a cocked angle over my bandana. The kids found that amusing. After clinic we fed everybody. It was rice and beans with sauce and kool-aid to drink. Our team, the interns and Christ and Bailey handed out the food. Wesley joined us too. We probably almost wore a path from the kitchen to the benches by clinic, we walked it so many times! Jennifer was very pleased because we got all done with clinic and everything by noon. Apparently that is a record for them! After lunch, which was Haitian spaghetti w/ fried hot dogs, avocados, and juice, we spent the the early afternoon trying to hang out with as many kids as we could. I might have forgotten to mention earlier that Davenel made me a bracelet w/ my name on it. Only he accidentally left out the second 'h'. (because they usually said my name 'heder') It's big for a bracelet on me though, so I just wear it as an anklet. Wesley made me a black and green lanyard out of some thin plastic string stuff (I've seen kids weave it into different stuff back in the states too). Come afternoon Wesley, Davenel, Ronald, Chris, Jesse and some of the others went to watch a soccer game in Pignon. Logan got to play in the soccer game! The girls weren't allowed to go, but it was pretty easy to pick him out in the pictures! He really enjoyed it he said, but he did get a small black eye and got accidentally punched in the head or something. While the guys were gone Jennifer had scheduled for some of the workers to come with market goods so we could buy stuff. I got a necklace (w/ a dolphin on it), a grass woven pad and a stained wooden box. On each of the items I got I worked the guy down to half of what he first asked (which was, of course, still more expensive than they would spend, but that's ok) It was $5 for the necklace, $4 box, $4 mat. I didn't mind supporting the folks though. The boys got back some time after five and they said Pignon won the game. The one we had watched previously they lost 0-6. We hung out more and then ate sandwiches early for dinner. Then we got ready to go to a special evening service at Pastor Francois' church. Some of our team and the kids rode in the truck but I walked with the rest of the kids. We did have a large entourage tramping down the road. Once again we sat at the front of church, but it was the front pews so we didn't see everyone staring at us! His church was a big building, at least for Pignon. There was a bass guitar and the guy who played the keyboard at Pastor Clebert's on Sunday also played it there. There were four choirs there, three female and one male. I'd say my favorite was the male choir and then one of the female choirs where on one song they had a bunch of motions and then they danced back to their seats still singing! Pastor Francois preached, and I could pick out a word here or there but I have no idea what the sermon was about! Jimmy and Christiana fell asleep on Jodi's lap and Francois fell asleep on mine. Several of the other little kids fell asleep on the pews! They usually go to bed about 6:30. After the service was over I held Jimmy until he was awake enough to walk. It was dark heading back (the service went from 7:00-9:30, and it gets dark way earlier in Haiti than back home. It was dusk when we first set out from the orphanage.) It was fun walking back because everybody was kinda subdued, the weather was beautiful, the starts were out, and the moon was just coming over the mountain. It truly was glorious!!! I know a lot of people to whom it is just boring, but even something as simple as that night just thrills me! I love God's creation. I stood outside for awhile just staring into the sky and watching the moon come over the mountain. After coming back, instead of our regular devotion we did one with all the blanc (white =D) gang and the older kids. Hannah and Jesse both played the guitar, but it was hard to find songs that both we and the Haitians knew w/ music. Then Logan did the devotion. Afterward the girls played Lago Lago (hide-n-seek) but their version is very different from the boys'. Instead of staying out and hiding, waiting to be found, they come racing back to the patio as soon as the 'it' person moves away. While they played some of us girls put together the leftover craft bags so that Jennifer could use them in the clinic when she needs. Some of the gang ate leftover Haitian spaghetti when we got back from church...but I just ate fresh mango pieces!!!

Tuesday, July 27th, 2010

2010-08-27T18:07:00.000-07:00

I got up at 5:30 so I went outside to sit under a tree and write. It was so cool that I had to get my hoodie, I had goosebumps! I honestly didn't make much progress on writing though before the little boys came to join me. Jimmy flip-flop was broken again so while I fixed it the boys colored in the back of my notebook. Breakfast was baked oatmeal (yum!) and passion fruit/citron juice. After breakfast we set up for our Olympics. The first events was the obstacle course (with the dizzy bat being my favorite part) We split the kids into four different age groups, sub-divided into boys and girls. That was a lot of fun. After we got all through with that we did three-legged races. The boys had a blast, but all the older girls were moping and poking around. We did manage to get the younger girls excited though, and they are so cute! Especially Benji and Rosie. Those two events took us up till the kids' shower and lunch time. Lunch was pumpkin soup! Totally delicious! (pumpkin, noodles, carrots, potatoes, goat) w/ crackers. After lunch we did a Frisbee toss and then the girls did jump rope while the boys bounced a soccer ball on their feet. Then we played Steal the Bacon. When we finished the Olympics we just played with the kids for the afternoon. Dinner was leftovers. After the devotions we watched Nacho Libre. I was pretty disappointed actually. I talked with Hannah a bit about why I didn't like the movie, but I won't go into that here. (that's not what the trip was about!) Oh, I forgot! Jennifer got a call from Jesse during lunch that he was getting ready to leave Port-au-Prince and would be in Pignon in about 20 minutes (instead of arriving tomorrow). After lunch we had to wait for Jennifer and when they did return of course Jesse was quite a distraction for awhile. And he and Benji are first time best friends! It makes me think of Robert with my younger siblings. It was so sweet to watch them together. Jesse is 18 and Benji is 7, and they'd never met before, but you would never have known!

Monday, July 26th, 2010

2010-08-26T08:26:00.000-07:00

Hilary's b-day today. Eggs and passion fruit juice for breakfast. The girls and Dorene spent awhile planning crafts for today. After Wesley and Davenel got back from soccer practice they took Marty, Logan and some of the other boys to climb Mt. Pignon. I really wanted to go, but none of the other girls wanted to. And we were here to spend time with the orphans, so I stayed with work with the girls. We took blocks of foam and I wrote Jezu renmen (Creole for Jesus loves) in fancy fonts on them. Then we brought groups of five girls at a time into the house and Hannah and Bethany and I helped them add their names and then color or decorate the foam with beads and stickers. Each piece had a string attached to it so the girls could hang them on their beds. Hilary and Dorene played with the girls outside and then played with foam letters. When I was done helping I went to the girls' house to play with some of the little girls there. Galeen, Galaan, Rosie, Dauline, David, Lisi, and others were out there. I started out singing to them, then with them...and then the Haitian workers joined in. It was so cool! It was beautiful. A lot of the kids and workers act shy, and won't usually sing if you just ask, but if you sing for them then they will. The ladies brought out a Haitian hymnal and I pulled out the words for our devotion time songs. We sang back and forth. And then they would hum or sing in Creole and if I recognized it I would sing along in English. One of the younger workers brought me paper and pen and asked me to write down some of the songs! We sang Amazing Grace, Come Thou Fount, Open the Eyes of My Heart Lord, My Jesus My Comfort, Lord I Lift Your Name On High, Here I Am to Worship, This Is the Air I Breathe, Open Our Eyes Lord, Worthy, etc. I really, really enjoyed that time. There were three separate times through the day that I specifically got to go sing with them for awhile. The third time I sang Mercy Is Falling, Father Abraham (w/ motions, they laughed at that one!!), and I'm In the Lord's Army. The kids thought those were pretty funny. Even the boys hung around the edges listening...except Otenel who came to beside me. Bethany, Hannah and I tried to play the Dead Fish game with some of the girls, but it didn't work too well. Jodi and Mia worked on teaching the kids Double Dutch. I helped too when I learned how to swing the ropes! I must say that was the only jump rope I've seen them try that they couldn't do. But some of them were getting the hang of it after fifteen or twenty minutes. Then Otenel decided he wanted to run on the path around to the rock pile, as fast as we could! Jimmy joined us. So I'd hold their hands and take off running as fast as I could. They had to run pretty fast too to keep up with me, but it didn't seem to phase them a bit...I was worn out! After lunch we brought all the older kids into the house w/ Pastor Clebert and showed them the movie, Pilgrim's Progress. We'd watch for awhile and then stop to answer any questions or explain confusing parts. Unfortunately the film wasn't in Creole so that made some of it tricky. I think that was a really good way to share the gospel with them though, and I think they really understood it pretty well. For dinner that night we had leftover soup, pasta, sandwiches, etc. It made for a lot of dishes, but I didn't mind because I'm used to lots of dishes!

Sunday, July 25th, 2010

2010-08-17T16:37:00.000-07:00

I fell asleep and slept late, so Hannah set my alarm clock to wake me up! For breakfast we had cereal, toast and passion fruit juice. Dorene and I did the dishes and then everyone got ready for church. The family, three interns, Lesefee (it was her 15th birthday), and our group went to Pastor Clebert's church. They usually go to Pastor Francois' church but Pastor Clebert was doing special services this weekend. We had church outside under a makeshift tent. The sides were lined with the most beautiful embroidered curtains! I was amazed at how well the people dressed. Despite the poverty level over there they were actually dressed in a nicer way than I dress for church. Most of the men in slacks, dress shirts and ties, some in full suits. The women were well dressed with nice shoes as well. There was a keyboard and two electric guitars. The singing was so cool! There were three different choirs there because of the special service. They each sang at least a couple different times. One of them was even divided into four part harmony. it was beautiful. There was LOTS and LOTS of singing. Jennifer sat beside me and I sorta mouthed (attempted) along with the Creole words in the hymnal. Then Pastor Clebert and his wife dedicated their baby. They were sitting up front and then the baby (well, toddler technically) started crying. Pastor Clebert's wife just started nursing her. It was a bit surprising at first but they have a different culture over there. After more singing Marty preached with Pastor Clebert translating. After more singing (I'm telling you they do a lot and it's such a joy to hear it!!) they had an altar call and five people came forward. It was a very moving service for me, despite the fact that I couldn't understand most of it. Afterward we ate lunch there. There was salad, rice and beans, pasta w/ ham and peppers, huddleoni-like pasta with spicy ketchupy stuff (huddleoni is meat, pasta, spaghetti sauce and cheese), fried potatoes, fried plantain, onion soup, and corn bread-like cake. After getting home from church we just had fun and played. I held Benji for a long time. I just loved getting to hold all the little kids. The group from the hospital (that flew down with us) came over for awhile. Ronald, Wesley, Davenel, and Logan went to watch a soccer game in town. Hilary, Hannah and I got permission to go join them. We walked into town but upon arriving at the soccer field the guys at the gate said we had to pay to get in. We didn't have any money on us of course, so we were going to go home, but then they said we could come in anyway! There is a wall built around the field for the purpose of making people pay to see the games. But apparently it didn't work so well. There were people watching through holes, sitting on the wall, and some people standing on the above ground graves in the cemetery across the street! Being there was quite an interesting peek into another aspect of Haitian culture. Back at the orphanage Otenel apparently decided that I was his temporary jungle gym. Then I played jump rope with Sabine, Galaan, Francois, Otenel and Hilary. The part of the time I jumped while holding Galaan on my back. That was quite difficult, but she laughed hysterically every time I did it! We had to be careful though because Danielle, Hannah and Logan were playing soccer with the older kids and sometimes the game came right over to us. After the kids went to bed we had dinner. It was potato soup w/ ham, corn and carrots and there was corn bread with it. It was delicious. We discussed climbing the mountain in the morning, but we would need a guide. The older boys had soccer practice and Jesse wasn't home, so that didn't work. We had Bible study and singing, and Benji joined us for that. It was so cute listening to her sing. I must say it has gotten a little uncomfortable to sleep at night because of one of the support bars in the mattress frame right across the middle of my back. But I honestly shouldn't complain, I at least had a bed. But since I'm journaling I decided to include that tidbit. I haven't been visited by any cockroaches, tarantulas or mosquitoes while in bed...so that's very good!

Saturday, July 24th, 2010

2010-08-09T12:53:00.000-07:00

At 6:15 Marty, Logan, Hilary, Hannah and I went walking. We walked through Pignon and to the bridge over the river. It was definitely an adventure walking through the ruts, around puddles, over trash and dodging dozens of honking motorcycles and a few trucks. But honestly I have never felt so conspicuous in my life. EVERYONE stared at us, many you could tell were talking about us. It was early morning, we were walking just because, and we were white. Five white people in the midst of hundreds of black ones. I've been different or stuck out before, but this was different than anything else I've ever experienced. At the bridge we saw two UN vehicles in the middle of the river getting washed. There were people bathing, swimming, washing clothes or bikes or wheelbarrows. The water is all muddy brown. There was corn planted up the side of almost cliff like banks along the river. The dirt banks are pretty amazing to look at. They look like cliff walls, but they are made entirely of orangish dirt! Coming back the gate was locked so we climbed over it! For breakfast we had cereal and toast. We spent the morning playing and hanging out. I took Jimmy to the swing and he sat on my lap while we swung really high. It's really fun swinging with them! Then Hilary played checkers with Wesley and lost. I played with him and I won, very surprising. He wasn't sure what to think of that, but Davenel thought it was funny. Otenel came and sat in my lap for awhile when we were outside. He just loves being held or being near you. He's one of those little guys who thrives on love. Lunch was rice w/ veggies and tuna patties w/ ketchup. After lunch Bill and I spent a long time talking about the home, Haiti, missions, government, the U.S., living your faith, etc. It was very enjoyable. After that I took a nap! That afternoon Bill took Logan, Hilary, Bethany, Dorene, Hannah and I to the market. Ronald and the cook rode in with us. The market was crowded, loud, and muddy. People cooking food, booths of canned goods, bullion, salts and seasonings. People sat on the ground with big bowls of rice and corn and other grains. There were rows and rows of sandals and flip-flops, some dress shoes too. There were shoes in many different places, some just laid out on a cloth in the mud. There was a booth full of raw meat chunks, I saw at least one whole goat head too. On the other side of the row from that were tubs of smelly, strange looking stuff. I could tell some were intestines but the other piles or slabs of stuff I didn't even want to guess at. There were tables and booths with clothing and all sorts of stuff. After we walked through, Bill took Logan back to get some chairs and such, so the girls stayed in the truck. While there some little boys stopped to watch us. The were really funny. They rapped a song in Creole (no idea what it was, of course) and then they were making all sorts of funny poses so Hannah would take pictures of them. Some teenage boys came over too, so Hannah asked them to go away. Back at the orphanage we sat around talking again. Davenel was holding a French/English dictionary and it gave me an idea. I asked the boys if the had a Creole/English dictionary. They did and brought it to me. So then I spent much of the afternoon trying to put together simple sentences and phrases in Creole. It was a lot of fun, plus it drove Hilary crazy not knowing what I was saying!!! Whenever I had trouble I just asked the kids and they told me what a word was or how to say it. I said stuff like: I like goat, I don't like oatmeal, sing for me, I like you (to 5 yr. Otenel), I said nothing, what should I say?, etc. The kids got a really big kick out of the fact that I was trying to do it. For dinner that night we had pizza casserole, garlic bread, and avocados!! We had our Bible study time, showers, and bed!

Friday, July 23rd, 2010

2010-08-09T10:45:00.001-07:00

I woke up about 6:00 but decided to fall asleep again. When I got up I went out to find the others and the first thing I heard that morning was a very sobering fact. Bill was sitting out front with Hilary and Dorene and as I walked up to the door he was telling them that the Haitian government only graduates the top 5% of students. That is the only amount they consider they have graduate worthy jobs for, or some such thing. The other 95% literally cannot graduate. That was tough to hear. Anyway, for breakfast we had eggs with seasonings and more juice. The intern girls told us that there was a donkey that went off every morning that sounded like it was dying. Logan and Marty said it did! After breakfast we went to the dorms to kinda break ice with the kids. How many names can I remember? Anyway I picked up Francee, 1 1/2 years old, and carried him around while meeting some girls. I took him with me to the Port girls' room where I met Betsy, Malcolm (yes, a girl), and Sabine. Sabine sang Jesus Loves Me, then This Little Light of Mine in English and Creole. I started teaching her Create In Me A Clean Heart with the motions. Then we went over to the porch where a bunch of the others were gathered. We played jump rope and talked and teased. Francee fell asleep in my lap, and the girls kept trying to wake him up but he was out... While we were sitting there Otenel, Willie and Jimmy were playing with Hilary's hair and headband, and Betsy reverse French braided mine. Davenel, Wesley (said 'Wisley'), Ronald ('wanel') and Jackinson stood by the garage watching us. But they kept acting shy. After I took Francee to his bed I played cards with one of the girls. Apparently there is almost no system to their card games! You make up the rules as you go. We went back to the porch and hung out until gradually all the children disappeared except Ronald (Wesley and Davenel had gone to soccer practice). We came to learn that all the kids had headed for a fruit tree growing between the girls' dorm and the kitchen. It was called a kenep tree (officially Mamoncillo). Some of the boys were climbing it and dropping fruit down. One of the girls held a tub up and they just dropped fruit into it. The fruit is between the size of a shooter marble and a ping pong ball. It has a thin, leathery green skin that you crack with your teeth. The flesh is an orange color with a big seed in the middle. The flesh is sweet and a bit sour, but more just different. The texture is crazy! It's kinda like jelly, but then a bit more like gelatin and grapes too. It has fibers like you find in apples though. It tastes good. You can't chew them though, you have to suck the fruit off the seed. For lunch we had Haitian spaghetti with fried hot dogs, rice w/ beans, avocados and pineapple. The fruit here is amazing! There are citron, coconut, pineapple, mango, papaya, kenep and other trees that grow there naturally. The avocados here are beyond belief! They are soft and soooo juicy, and they're almost sweet. So fresh... After lunch I took a nap. When I got up the girls were using washable paints and doing face painting. Davenel draw birds for a couple of them, he's a pretty good artist. The kids also love teasing us by taking in Creole and not telling us what they said. Jennifer gave the kids some candy and then they were trying to put the trash in our pockets so they didn't have to throw it away. Some of the kids were having foot races just because and Hannah joined them. She's really fast!! I think one of my favorite things to do was just when we all sit around with the kids on our laps, tickling them, talking, laughing. That afternoon Jennifer went to the store and Benji, Dorene, Hilary, Danielle and I went along. Danielle and I sat in the truck bed, but you have to hold on pretty good 'cause it's a rough ride! The streets around are rough and muddy, ruts, rocks and puddles everywhere. The store was really small, and it was the best store in Pignon. One wall was about 10 ft. and the other maybe 14ft. They had a variety of things though...chips, syrup, spaghetti sauce, crackers, soaps, shampoo, salt, ketchup, canned goods. There were hardly any kitchen staples. We looked for coffee creamer but we couldn't find it at any of the three stores we went to. We headed for a fourth but got stopped by construction in the road. A big pit with rebar gridding went all the way across so we couldn't get over! There are between 30,000 and 40,000 people in and around Pignon. But the buildings are small and rugged, my mind can't comprehend how there are that many people in those conditions and space. For dinner we had leftovers. I learned that the big green citrus fruit are not limes as I thought, but oranges! Hannah, Hilary and I did the dishes, we had a our devotion time, took showers and then some of us headed to bed. We were laying in bed when Hannah came racing into the room and jumped onto her bed! She was worried about the cockroaches and tarantulas. It was really funny. Then Hilary thought she was feeling a cockroach in her sheets. After that we got into the randomest, silliest conversation. It began with Hilary's boyfriend's job (he works construction and Bridges Over Missouri). Hannah thought Bridges Over Missouri was restoring old red covered bridges around the state, and I thought it meant to road bridge repairs. We laughed so hard when Hilary corrected us to say that it was actually working with brain injury patients! Boy, were we confused. From there it went on to a guy who fell off scaffolding, cracked his head, and his brain landed in a bucket of paint...but the dude is still alive! After that craziness we came to the conclusion that cracking your skull is nothing like splitting a kenep! (inside joke) and then after trail mix at 10:30 we went to sleep!

Thursday, July 22nd, 2010

2010-08-08T20:38:00.000-07:00

At 4:15 a.m. Florida time, 3:15 in Mo, we woke up to the phone ringing. (We'd asked the night before that we receive a wake up call) After groggily getting ready and eating breakfast we headed for the MFI airport. Arriving at 6:00 we weighed our luggage and waited with two other groups of people for departure. The MFI has three planes. We flew in a DC-3, which was a WWII cargo plane. Our pilots were named Joe and Ray. The plane was, of course, smaller, louder and hotter than the commercial jets on which we'd flown...but the seats were more comfortable and reclined farther back. There were 14 passengers on the plane. The fun thing was that the other group was seven people, five girls and two guys, and they were going to Pignon too. But not only that, they would visit the orphanage on Sunday were we were staying! We taxied out the the runway and sat for awhile with the pilots running the engines at different speeds. Then, to our surprise, we taxied back to the hanger! We were unloaded from the plane and waited. One of the motors was running roughly due to moisture or something and they had to fix that. Turns out both planes taking off that morning had to come back for that. We did watch the sunrise in Florida though. It was beautiful. Back in the plane I loved the take-off! It was just so thrilling! I was sitting by a window and being a smaller plane I could see the propeller on my side AND the ground below. The first part of the flight was amazing! I know I've seen pictures but you always wonderf if they've been edited. But with my own eyes I watched us going over the brightest, clearest blue and green water I have EVER seen! Most of the rest of the gang slept much of the time, I couldn't though I tried. It was so cool though because I got to go up in the cockpit and sit directly behind the pilots. You got a headset and microphone so you could talk with the pilots or listen to the people in control towers in the islands we flew over! Ray told me about a lot of the different gauges, etc. and their instruments that show their direction in degrees. Up front you could see far out to the side and ahead of you in a big panorama. Most of the way it was clouds around and above. But I was up front when we flew over Paradise Island, where I saw a cruise ship in port, and Nassau...where I saw the airport and listened to the control tower guys! Then we flew over the Exuma Cays. We landed in Exuma for a short refueling and we unloaded and went into a shop. I can actually say I've been to the Bahamas...for about 20-30 minutes. The water around the Bahamas and Haiti was the most magnificent I've ever seen. It was colors of blue, green, teal and turquoise that I could never describe. The sand was pure white and the water was crystal clear. But the bad part about Exuma was the landing. I had no trouble on the commercial flights, but from when we began our descent to when we landed I got the worst motion sickness I've ever had. My stomach felt twisted and ready to heave, and it was terrible. It was cool to get off in Exuma but I didn't feel well...light-headed and queasy. It was a total of probably five hours between Florida and Haiti. From Exuma...which Hannah nicknamed Excelsior Springs because she forgot the name, we went to Port-au-Prince. We were supposed to go to Cape Haitian but due to circumstances had to refuel in Port instead. This was a God-send though because we wouldn't have been able to unload our boxes of sports stuff in Cape. It was rough landing at Port too, but I ate as we descended and wrote furiously, some of which random scribblings I may include here, and that helped, but oh it was still bad. At Port we had to go into the hot, stuffy airport and get our passports checked and then waited around under the wing for awhile while the refueled the plane. The breeze was nice there. While we were embarking an Italian plane came in. There was a fleet of UN vehicles that came around it and two or three soldiers at least with weapons. I'm not sure what it was, but the person(s) mush have been important! Port was on the other side of the airport but from what I could see there were houses on top of each other (literally) and all smashed up against each other. The didn't look like our kind of houses either. Oh, I forgot to tell you. The flight between Exuma and Haiti was really fun. We spent the first part of it playing hangman, random phrases like auxiliary exit, smoking is prohibited, Haiti or bust, keep feet off walls, etc. The rest of it we spent much of sitting or standing on the floor and looking out the windows. The islands were beautiful as we flew over them. The mountains were covered in trees and the landscape was amazing. Some of the water around Haiti was a rich deep blue. Back to flying... when we got into the plane in Port it was pretty hot. We started sweating right away. I was weary and tired so I decided to make another attempt at sleeping, though all my past attempts on the trip had failed. Well, I was successful and was blissfully unaware of the fact that we were coming down into Pignon until the wheels hit the runway. It was bumpy but not anything like the other landings as earlier. I wasn't sick at all! I was quite surprised that I got to sleep (that part of the flight was only 15 minutes) but quite glad I did! We unloaded and there was a group of Haitians and several white people waiting. The other group headed for the hospital and then Bill and Jennifer Campbell and Pastor Francois took us to the orphanage in their trucks. The windows were open and the seat I sat on had been in the sun and was so hot that I burned myself! I had to sit on the very edge until it cooled down. Behind the airport, which was one small building, there were several donkeys and horses wandering by trailing long straps behind them. A girl was leading two and one of them had its rope caught in the other's legs. The road through Pignon was a mess. It was huge mud puddles in some places and hard and rutted in others. There were huge rocks sticking up all over. There was a barrel in the road one place and a truck broken down on the side. In the U.S. driver yield to pedestrians. But in Haiti animals, people and motorcycles yield to trucks! There were scrawny dogs everywhere and people rode by on heavily loaded donkeys and horses, goats everywhere, and a couple oxen. There were people everywhere. Some were working, others were playing or just sitting around doing nothing. They had a great variety of clothes, a lot of them dirty. There was at least one baby that I saw sitting on a chair and it didn't have clothes on. The buildings were unlike any houses I know in the states. They were small and a variety of colors. Browns, tans, reds, blues, yellows. They were squarish buildings all close together. Some had solid doors, others were just sorta open. There were some with screens or patterns of iron over the windows. There are hardly any wooden fences, they just grow cactus hedges. They plant the cactus in rows and then trim them to make a fenceline. I sure wouldn't try to get through one of THOSE! It was strange though, riding in the truck we pasted just feet from these people and they were watching us. But even though I know I was there it didn't seem real. I knew it was happening but seeing something like that was so different and yet it was more real and personal that other things I've seen. The orphanage compound has a cactus hedge and trees around it, with a locked gate. Mt. Pignon stands behind it. The orphanage has several buildings, and a work crew is working on a new kitchen for the kids. The workers make the cinder blocks themselves. There is actually quite a bit of grass in the orphanage...and fruit! There are fruit trees all around. The kids were standing around watching us as we arrived but they kinda hung back. The girls in our team stayed in the Campbells' house and the guys stayed above the old library, which is currently doubling as temporary housing for some Port orphan girls. We washed up and had lunch. It was rice, beans, cashew and onion sauce, fresh avocados, mango and pineapple! There was citron (lemon-lime) juice to drink. After lunch Hilary and I went out to see the kids. Wesley came over to say hello and so did Maudeline. The others played and watched us. We had a tour of part of the compound and then went back to the house. We had a praise time after awhile (Hannah had her guitar) and then talked about the first chapter of The Cross Centered Life by C.J. Mahaney. I was so tired that I was falling asleep. The others had of course slept a ton while in the air, but I'd only gotten those fifteen minutes. After that we talked with the three interns (Jodi, Danielle and Mia) and played with Lina, Chrissy and Benji. They are the Campbells' girls. All three of them are 7 years old, but Benji looks about 5. (Due to her conditions before coming to the orphanage) The Campbells are in the process of adopting Chrissy and Lina. Lina they've had since she was a baby...the funny thing being that she was the first orphan and what they had planned as an "all boys-no babies" orphanage! That changed! Benji they've only had about 6 months. I spent a long time catching up on journaling and then we had PB'Js for dinner. We went to bed about nine.

Wednesday, July 21st, 2010

2010-08-01T14:25:00.000-07:00

Mom woke me up at two ‘til 4:00 a.m. She said Dad’s alarm clock had gone off and she was afraid I’d missed the meeting time for the team at the church. When more awake I came to understand that Dad usually sets his alarm for 5:30 but he set it for 4:00 so he and Mom could tell me good-bye before I left! My family was so good to me. Monica had stayed for dinner the night before, and Robert had called to wish me well and let me know he was praying. I gave Mom and Dad hugs and headed for the church. I arrived at o’dark-thirty (4:40) to find Hilary and her family, and Dorene already there. Stan Inman, Ross Hall and David DeMasters were also there because they had come to see us off. Pam Holdeman came with Marty as well. Hannah and Bethany arrived with their dad and Josiah who would be our chauffeurs to the airport. After a prayer we left at 5:00. On the drive to the airport a few people slept, but I couldn’t. Someone asked me if I was excited. I think I was, but I wasn’t feeling it like I normally do. Mostly I felt ready and like I was beginning a journey and was just waiting for what would come. In a way I was, and not just physically. When we arrived at KCI we had a long wait so we got Starbucks for breakfast. And as a side note I got a Café Latte, but wasn’t big on it. When we checked our carry-on luggage Marty got stopped. His suntan lotion got taken away- not sure what he was trying to bring in =) The first flight was a thrill for me because I haven’t flown in about ten years. It was so cool to watch the take-off and watch the land go by underneath us. We flew over Springfield, just cool for me since Robert lives there. Hilary, Logan and Hannah all slept at points, and the ‘grown up’ folks read most of the flight. It was kinda fun ‘cause the airplane had Owl CityAtlanta we ate lunch at the airport and went to wait at the terminal for our next flight. We’d been sitting there for awhile when Marty left and then came over to tell us that our flight had changed terminals. The girls got over to the new terminal just in time to discover that our names were being called and they were about to cancel our seats on the plane! Marty went to fetch Logan, who’d gone to the restroom, and we couldn’t see them anywhere. It was quite stressful for a bit, but they did make it in time. And then we sat in the plane at the terminal for fifteen minutes…what a case of ‘hurry-up-and-wait’. Upon arriving in Florida and getting our baggage we took the shuttle to get our rental cars. There was a corvette in the lot…wish it had been for us =( Since we had flown into West Palm Beach we had to drive to Fort Pierce where our hotel was for the night. We went to Golden Corral for dinner. I tell you it cost so much that most of us ate too much food just so we could feel like we got our money’s worth. Now on the way to Ft. Pierce we decided to name Marty’s Garmin. Hannah said it should be Darla, which later switched to Delilah. But Logan decided Kamdoneesha would be good (the child character in a friend’s short story!)…Marty proceeded to refer to it as Veneesha. So Kamdoneesha took us to the airport in Ft. Pierce (MFI) after dinner, because we wanted to make the drive before doing it in the dark the next morning. For there we decided to wander around and see if we could get to the beach, which was really close. We went through some lovely land, found a public beach access…and no parking. =( We did drive over to a little island playing during boarding and departing. During our layover in before heading back to the hotel though. I think the thing I found the most strange about Florida was the palm trees mixed in with others. They grew like any old, ordinary tree, which they are down there, but not in Missouri! So that was my first hot and humid taste of Florida. At the hotel there were the five girls in one room and the two guys in the other. We managed fine, but we might do better if our next team is more evenly balanced =P We went to bed after watching some America’s Got Talent while people rotated through the shower. It was about 10:30.

Haiti!!!

2010-07-20T12:31:00.000-07:00

...here I come! So this is an update on my not-very-up-to-date blog. (actually I don't know if anyone even reads it anymore!) But anyway, I imagine you guessed by the title of this post that I am headed to Haiti!

We leave tomorrow morning at 5:00 a.m. to drive to the airport. A team of seven people from our church-a deacon, an older woman, and five young adults- are going to Haiti to work in an orphanage over there that our church supports. While we are there we will help around the orphanage, go to the local hospital, do a sports event for the kids, help in the milk clinic for mothers, and most importantly spend time working and playing with the children! I've never been on a mission trip before (and never been out of the country) so this is very exciting and new for me! There are about 45 children at the orphanage we will be visiting.
Our trip will be 10 days, which I imagine will feel altogether too short!! Please pray for our team's safety while we are traveling and while we are in Haiti. Pray for the orphans and chances to share the gospel with them. Pray that the whole trip would go well and that we might glorify God through everything we do! I don't think I'll have internet during the trip but I'll tell you about it when we get back!

Wait...

2010-07-03T18:58:00.000-07:00

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried:
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I plead and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said,
“Child, you must wait.”

“Wait? You say, wait!” my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is Your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith, I have asked, and am claiming Your Word.

My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and YOU tell me to WAIT?
I’m needing a “Yes”, a go-ahead sign,
Or even a “NO” to which I can resign.

And Lord, You promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry:
“I’m weary of asking! I need a reply!”

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, “You must wait.”
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, “So, I’m waiting…for what?”

He seemed, then, to kneel
And His eyes wept with mine,
And He tenderly said, “I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.

All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want
But, you wouldn’t know Me.
You’d not know the power I give to the faint;

You’d not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there;
You’d not know the joy of resting in Me;
When darkness and silence were all you could see.

You’d never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You’d know that I give and I save, for a start,
But, you’d not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that’s beyond getting just what you have asked
Or an infinite God, who makes what you have last.

You’d never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that, “My grace is sufficient for thee.”
Yes, your dreams for your loved one
Overnight would come true,

But, Oh, the Loss! If I lost what I’m doing in you!

So, be silent, My child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft’ may My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still wait.

Haiti Mission Trip!

2010-05-22T16:26:00.000-07:00

Dear Family and Friends,

I wasn’t sure how to start this letter, but here goes! For several years I’ve wanted to get involved in at least one or two short-term mission trips. I’m excited to say that this summer I have been blessed with the opportunity to do so! My home church, Bethany Baptist, has worked closely with Red Bridge Baptist Church (in KC area) for several years to support an orphanage in Haiti. In July a team of seven church members are scheduled to fly to Haiti and work with the orphanage there.

For those of you who don’t know (though with the news lately I imagine most do), Haiti shares an island in the Caribbean with the Dominican Republic, and has for a long time been the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere. The name of the orphanage we will visit there is Haiti Home of Hope (www.haitihomeofhope.org), located in Pignon [pin-yone]. What a fitting name, because this orphanage does offer home to the children it houses!! The Home of Hope was not close enough to the earthquake center to receive physical damage earlier this year; however the staff there still has their hands full with the almost 50 children for whom the orphanage provides housing, food, clothing and education.

The team from our church will fly out of Kansas City on Wednesday, July 21^st and return on the 30^th. Our team consists of two adults, and five young adults/youth. While in Haiti we will be involved in work projects (painting, maintenance, etc.), providing a short sports camp for the orphans, serving a day in the milk clinic (for mothers w/ babies who need nutrition), visiting the hospital, etc. Most importantly we will just spend quality time with the children showing them that we care about them, ministering to them, and giving them attention that they don’t always get due simply to the large number of them. We can witness to the children and show them the love of Christ in a great way while we are there, and having time to bond with them helps them open their hearts to the gospel.

I greatly value and request that use this information and pray for me and our team. Matthew 18:20 says “Where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.” Prayer is an invaluable tool in the Christian life and God works miracles sometimes because of it. It is also a great stronghold in fighting a spiritual battle. Haiti is a very dark country spiritually, and there is a tremendous voo-doo influence there that could potentially be difficult to encounter. Please pray for:

-Protection from demonic influences

-Safe travel for our team and while in Haiti

-That all team members stay healthy and have no injuries

-That our team would bond together in the months leading to the trip

-That we would know what the Lord wants us do and prepare that well

-For all necessary funds to be provided for the team

-For the team to serve and work however the Lord will use us

I believe that God can use our team to help change the lives of these orphans and probably us as well. Thank you for lifting us up in prayer!

The second reason I write this letter is to ask that you would consider financially supporting this trip. The cost for each individual going (primarily the round trip airfare from Kansas City to Florida, Florida to Haiti) is about $1,100. Each individual going is responsible to contribute whatever necessary to cover the cost of his/her going. (Fundraisers and love offerings have contributed funds) Any financial support you give will be used to help cover this cost. Please seek the Lord as to whether He would have you give. (even small donations do add up) If you cannot give financial support or don’t feel called to do so I understand. But I would ask that you still pray for our team and our trip.

Thank you for your support!

In Christ,

~Heather Tull

heather@tulltribe.org

Give you my house...

2010-05-01T16:09:00.000-07:00

I was in my neighborhood restaurant this morning and was seated behind a group of jubilant individuals celebrating the successful passing of the recent health care bill. I could not finish my breakfast. This is what ensued:

They were a diverse group of several races and both sexes. I heard the young man exclaim, “Isn’t Obama like Jesus Christ? I mean, after all, he is healing the sick.” The young woman enthusiastically proclaimed, “Yeah, and he does it for free. I cannot believe anyone would think that a free market would work for health care. They are all crooks and thieves and don’t deserve all of that money.” Another said, ‘The stupid Republicans want us all to starve to death so they can inherit all of the power. Obama should be made a Saint for what he did for those of us less fortunate.” At this, I had had enough.

I arose from my seat, mustering all the restraint I could find, and approached their table. “Please excuse me; may I impose upon you for one moment?” They smiled and welcomed me to the conversation. I stood at the end of their table, smiled as best I could and began an experiment.

“I would like to give one of you my house. It will cost you no money and I will pay all of the expenses and taxes for as long as you live there. Anyone interested?” They looked at each other in astonishment. “Why would you do something like that?” asked a young man, “There isn’t anything for free in this world.” They began to laugh at me, as they did not realize this man had just made my point. “I am serious, I will give you my house for free, no money what so ever. Anyone interested?” In unison, a resounding “Hell Yeah” fills the room.

“Since there are too many of you, I will have to make a choice as to who receives this money free bargain.” I noticed an elderly couple was paying attention to the spectacle unfolding before their eyes, the old man shaking his head in apparent disgust. “I tell you what; I will give it to the one of you most willing to obey my rules.” Again, they looked at one another, an expression of bewilderment on their faces. The perky young woman asked, “What are the rules?” I smiled and said, “I don’t know. I have not yet defined them. However, it is a free home that I offer you.” They giggled amongst themselves, the youngest of which said, “What an old coot. He must be crazy to give away his home. Go take your meds, old man.” I smiled and leaned into the table a bit further. “I am serious, this is a legitimate offer.” They gaped at me for a moment.

“Hell, I’ll take it you old fool. Where are the keys?” boasted the youngest among them. “Then I presume you accept ALL of my terms then?” I asked. The elderly couple seemed amused and entertained as they watched from the privacy of their table. “Oh hell yeah! Where do I sign up?” I took a napkin and wrote, “I give this man my home, without the burden of financial obligation, so long as he accepts and abides by the terms that I shall set forth upon consummation of this transaction.” I signed it and handed it to the young man who eagerly scratched out his signature. “Where are the keys to my new house?” he asked in a mocking tone of voice. All eyes were upon us as I stepped back from the table, pulling the keys from pocket and dangling them before the excited new homeowner.

“Now that we have entered into this binding contract, witnessed by all of your friends, I have decided upon the conditions you are obligated to adhere from this point forward. You may only live in the house for one hour a day. You will not use anything inside of the home. You will obey me without question or resistance. I expect complete loyalty and admiration for this gift I bestow upon you. You will accept my commands and wishes with enthusiasm, no matter the nature. Your morals and principles shall be as mine. You will vote as I do, think as I do and do it with blind faith. These are my terms. Here are your keys.” I reached the keys forward and the young man looked at me dumbfounded.

“Are you out of your freaking mind? Who would ever agree to those ridiculous terms?” the young man appeared irritated. “You did when you signed this contract before reading it, understanding it and with the full knowledge that I would provide my conditions only after you committed to the agreement.” Was all I said. The elderly man chuckled as his wife tried to restrain him. I was looking at a now silenced and bewildered group of people. “You can shove that stupid deal up you’re a** old man, I want no part of it” exclaimed the now infuriated young man. “You have committed to the contract, as witnessed by all of your friends; you cannot get out of the deal unless I agree to it. I do not intend to let you free now that I have you ensnared. I am the power you agreed to. I am the one you blindly and without thought chose to enslave yourself to. In short, I am your Master.” At this, the table of celebrating individuals became a unified group against the unfairness of the deal.

After a few moments of unrepeatable comments and slurs, I revealed my true intent. “What I did to you is what this administration and congress did to you with the health care legislation. I easily suckered you in and then revealed the real cost of the bargain. Your folly was in the belief that you can have something you did not earn; that you are entitled to that which you did not earn; that you willingly allowed someone else to think for you. Your failure to research, study and inform yourself permitted reason to escape you. You have entered into a trap from which you cannot flee. Your only chance of freedom is if your new Master gives it to you. A freedom that is given can also be taken away; therefore, it is not freedom.” With that, I tore up the napkin and placed it before the astonished young man. “This is the nature of your new health care legislation.”

I turned away to leave these few in thought and contemplation and was surprised by applause. The elderly gentleman, who was clearly entertained, shook my hand enthusiastically and said, “Thank you Sir, these kids don’t understand Liberty these days.” He refused to allow me to pay my bill as he said, “You earned this one, it is an honor to pickup the tab.” I shook his hand in thanks, leaving the restaurant somewhat humbled, and sensing a glimmer of hope for my beloved country.

Use reason, Clifford A Wright

Feel free to share.

Love and purity...

2010-04-23T13:41:00.000-07:00

Though the Romans were pagan people, and there were many atrocities and horrors committed by them, you will sometimes find a remnant of morality and right in their midst. This story touched me, and I hope it is a challenge to you:

While the decemvirs had control in Rome Appius Claudius desired a certain girl, the only daughter of Lucius Verginius, who was betrothed to Lucius Icilius. His attempts to seduce her with money and promises failed, so he succeeded in attempting to prove that she was a slave of one of his companions and must be kept in custody by him. When Icilius heard the ruling:

Then a lictor called out that, judgment having been given, the case was over, and tried to shove Icilius, despite his loud protests, out of the way. Even the mildest of men would have been enraged at such an insult. Icilius turned on Appius. ‘Get rid of me?’ he cried; ‘only naked steel will do that – if you are to get away with your loathsome secret, and no one be the wiser. I am to marry this girl, and I mean to have a virgin for my bride. Call every lictor in the city – let them get out their rods and axes – I refuse to let my promised wife pass the night away from her father’s house. You have made slaves of us all – you have robbed the people of their right to appeal and of the protection of their tribunes; but that does not mean you have the lordship of your lusts over our wives and children. Fulfill your savage pleasure on our backs and necks; at least our chastity shall be safe from you: assault that, and I will call upon every man in Rome to defend my bride – Verginius will raise the army on behalf of his only daughter – all of us will move heaven and earth to help us, and never shall you get away with the infamous judgment you have given unless you kill us. I conjure you, Appius, to think seriously where you are going. Verginius can decide what to do about his daughter when he comes; but I wish him to know that, if he yields to this fellow’s claim, he will have to look for another son-in-law. For my part, in defense of my bride’s freedom, I will die sooner than betray her.’

Jesse is home...

2010-04-03T17:30:00.000-07:00

baby Jesse got home from the hospital yesterday. He is on a monitor for his heart beat and his breathing to make sure he does ok. But he seems to be doing fine now. Thanks to everyone for prayers. They are greatly appreciated.

Pray for Jesse

2010-03-30T07:19:00.000-07:00

Baby Jesse R. (4 days old) is in Pediatric ICU with some heath complications right now. Mom and Dad R. are with him and I'm caring for the five young girls at their home. Please pray that Jesse's health be fully restored and that doctors figure out what's wrong. Please pray that Mom and Dad R. won't be worn down too fast and that they are comforted despite their worries. Please pray that everything would go well as I care for the girls too! Thanks prayer warriors!

Introducing you to my new man.....Schae......

2010-03-20T07:13:00.000-07:00

For those of you who might have been worried by that post title :P no it's not a person! This is my new puppy. He is a German Shepherd/Siberian Husky mix. He's about 8 weeks old, and he's a very sweet, inquisitive little fellow! I named him Schae ('shay') after the German for German Shepherd- Schaferhund. So here's Schae....enjoy the pictures, I'll definitely get more as he grows!

The Nicene Creed

2010-03-05T09:29:00.000-08:00

We believe in one God the Father Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth, and of all things visible and invisible; and in one Lord Jesus Christ, the only-begotten Son of God, begotten of His Father before all worlds, God of God, Light of Light, very God of very God, begotten, not made, being of one substance with the Father; by whom all things were made; who for us men, and for our salvation, came down from heaven, and was incarnate by the Holy Ghost of the virgin Mary, and was made man; and was crucified also for us under Pontius Pilate; He suffered and was buried, and the third day He rose again according to the Scriptures, and ascended into heaven, and sitteth on the right hand of the Father; and He shall come again with glory to judge both the quick and the dead; whose kingdom shall have no end. And we believe in the Holy Ghost, the Lord and Giver of life, who proceedeth from the Father and the Son, who with the Father and the Son together is worshiped and glorified; who spake by the prophets. And we believe in one holy catholic and apostolic church; we acknowledge one baptism for the remission of sins; and we look for the resurrection of the dead, and the life of the world to come. Amen.

My Swiss/German/Celtic/whatever you think it looks like....costume!

2010-02-26T08:29:00.000-08:00

Here are some pictures of the costume I made...well minus the vest...which a friend loaned to me....and I very seriously am considering whether I can beg her to make me one as well :P
Anyway I'll use it for the musical freestyle I'm doing on Woodrow next month...and otherwise just have it around...'til I have to send the vest home :'(
We went out yesterday to shoot some pics, only we didn't get many before the camera died, but here's what we got:

Love the light on this one...

I love my boots...

Probably my very favorite...

Generations of Virtue giveaway...

2010-02-19T07:13:00.000-08:00

Feelin' Feminine is doing another very cool giveaway! This time it is a gift certificate to the Generations of Virtue product line! GOV has many excellent materials...books and more! Many that should be added to your libraries, etc. I'm spreading the news about this giveaway and about this excellent site! Here is the link to GOV. Here is the link to the giveaway!

Rebelution Book Bomb!

2010-02-15T17:16:00.000-08:00

Alex and Brett Harris have a new book that's about to come out and they're trying to get the word around like they did with Do Hard Things. One goal is to make it big with the Amazon.com Book Bomb, it's a great way to get the word out, but they need help! If anyone's interested in the book and spreading the word go here and find out what to do!!!!

Stylish Modesty Giveaway!

2010-02-08T08:49:00.000-08:00

The Feelin' Feminine website is sponsoring a giveaway by Stylish Modesty and I'm interested. I've really enjoyed everything I've read so far on the Feelin' Feminine site and so I wanted to share about it with others and tell about the giveaway! Here's the link if you're interested:
http://feelinfeminine.com/?p=3854

By God's grace...

2010-02-06T11:12:00.000-08:00

Well, I was trying to decide if I would really publish this post, and since you're seeing it, you know the answer. I'm not looking for all sorts of condolences, pity or anything. I'm putting this here because through it my Maker and Lord can be glorified. He indeed has a might hand.

I had a car wreck the other day. Hit a slick spot in the road, lost control, and ended up spinning off the highway into a ditch...on the opposite side of the road and facing the direction from which I'd come. I was stopped by a fence line full of trees. Needless to say the car was damaged, in fact totaled and undrivable. The back windshield was gone, the trunk had been jacked up, the right rear quarter panel smashed against the wheel, the passenger window shattered, the right front quarter panel and door dented in, one of the wheels messed up, multiple things. The car won't even run......and I got out uninjured. Well my neck was out of place, and the chiropractor fixed that, but otherwise I have no injuries....at all. I'm kinda sore and stiff, but not even any bruises. It was by God's grace that I wasn't injured. I don't know why not, but I do know that in the midst of everything that happened in those few terrifying seconds He placed His hand on me. He's not done with me yet. This is the second accident I've had, and in the first I got a hairline fracture in my nose and had two black eyes, but otherwise, I was uninjured. My mind keeps going back to what happened, keeps thinking about the damage I caused, keeps wondering how I'm going to pay for it, keeps wondering what my family will do without that car......but I need to turn to the fact that God protected me, that despite everything that happened I can say, "God is good." He preserved my life. Whether in either case it would have been likely that I could have been killed or severely injured I don't know. If the driver side of the car had hit the fence line this time I would have gotten hurt for sure, but it didn't. Even though I had lost control, God was still in control of the situation. Everyone keeps telling me that the most important thing is that I'm alive and uninjured, the car is replaceable. God is in control of my life and in this case even I turn to Him and say, "thank you. You know the course You have set for my life and You will protect me. God is gracious to me. I don't deserve the care He gives to me. Truly must His name be glorified." I'm putting some of the picture of the car below. When you see them truly you must know that God must be praised for my safety. It was His hand that prevented my injury:

trunk jacked funny

rear windshield gone

smashed right rear quarter panel

smashed section and absence of windshield

dented passenger door without window or mirror

smashed over the right front tiredented and jammed over the rear wheel

but the driver side is practically unmarked.....

The Apostles' Creed

2010-02-05T18:57:00.000-08:00

I believe in God the Father Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ His only Son our Lord; who was conceived by the Holy Ghost, born of the virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, dead, and buried; He descended into hell; the third day He rose again from the dead; He ascended into heaven, and sitteth on the right hand of God the Father Almighty; from thence He shall come to judge the quick and the dead. I believe in the Holy Ghost; the holy catholic church; the communion of saints; the forgiveness of sins; the resurrection of the body; and the life everlasting. Amen.

Mr. Willybag!

2010-01-13T07:41:00.001-08:00

My brothers decided to build a snowman about a week ago when we first got snow. Since it's been so cold he has had a very long life and his end is not yet in sight! So here are some pictures!

Homeschool Dropouts giveaway...

2010-01-12T07:32:00.001-08:00

I know someone who is doing a giveaway on her blog of the new documentary film Homeschool Dropouts. I thought I'd let other people know about the giveaway and the documentary! Here is a link to the friend's blog. And a link to the product page.

I haven't seen it yet but it sounds like an excellent film.

The Best Heart's Ease...

2010-01-11T12:25:00.000-08:00

I read this on a friend's blog and it really touched me in a special way so I wanted to share it as well...

" I have learned in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content." Phil.4:11

Paul, denied of every comfort, wrote the above words in his dungeon. A story is told of a king who went into his garden one morning, and found everything withered and dying. He asked the oak that stood near the gate what the trouble was. He found it was sick of life and determined to die because it was not tall and beautiful like the pine. The pine was all out of heart because it could not bear grapes, like the vine. The vine was going to throw its life away because it could not stand erect and have as fine fruit as the peach tree. The geranium was fretting because it was not tall and fragrant like the lilac; and so on all through the garden. Coming to a heart's ease, he found its bright face lifted as cheery as ever. "Well, heart's-ease, I'm glad, amidst all this discouragement, to find one brave little flower. You do not seem to be the least disheartened." "No, I am not of much account, but I thought that if you wanted an oak, or a pine, or a peach tree, or a lilac in my place, you would have planted one; but as I knew you wanted a heart's ease, I am determined to be the best little heart's-ease that I can."

"Others may do a greater work,
But you have your part to do;
And no one in all God's heritage
Can do it so well as you."

They who are God's without reserve, are in every state content; for they will only what He wills, and desire to do for Him whatever He desires them to do; they strip themselves of everything, and in this nakedness find all things restored an hundredfold.

-Mrs. Charles E. Cowman

The ECD...

2010-01-04T13:54:00.000-08:00

This weekend my brother, Greg and I got to attend our first ever English Country Dance. My older brother lives in Springfield and he and some friends invited us to come down...so here are some pictures of the fun time!

Summer and Greg during the Virginia Reel...the costumes are very cool!

Melody! She's such a sweet little girl, and SOOO cute!

Next comes pictures of the Posties Jig. The group Robert was in is pretty good and they like doing it fast...the guys also like jumping and they got some real air in some of these pictures!
Erik, Amanda, Laura, Robert, Summer

Christian, Robert, Erik

Laura, Robert, Christian, Summer

Christian, Erik, Laura, Summer, Robert (see Christian's jump? Of course I think Erik helped him out a bit ;o)

Greg's wearing his Colonel Brandon costume from the Sense and Sensibility play. He did get sweaty enough dancing that he finally just took off his jacket and waistcoat!

David, Laura, Christian

hmm...this one looks kinda funny! David, Erik, Amanda, Laura, Robert

Robert, Christian, David, Erik (a friend said it looks like Erik's just standing around up there, and my mom said it looks like he's levitating!)

Greg during the Posties Jig (he was in a different group than Robert)

Laura and I- she's such a sweet friend!

Summer and Laura-they are sisters...and good friends to me! (Christian is their brother)

Heidi and I (another sweet friend, and Erik's sister...yep, we tend to make friends in families with multiple children...I wonder why...lol)

and so far this is the only picture I've found among what other friends have taken that I'm actually in! (I know, bad grammar, but I didn't feel like fixing it) I'm the one in the blue dress on the far right...during The Next Dance.

it's real...

2009-12-31T14:58:00.000-08:00

Perhaps you’ve been there. And then perhaps you haven’t. A world that exists, though many people say it isn’t possible. How do they know? What if it is? What if people don’t believe, or know that it’s not in existence in reality, but in reality it’s there? Though it’s just not conceivable to our world.
I know it is. You might not, but I know people who do. Anyone who has never completely lost his childhood knows what I mean. It’s the world that exists that doesn’t exist. It’s really there even though it isn’t. It’s your world. A place that you know perfectly and yet other people say is not possible. What if it is? I believe it is. This is it.
You can see it, you can smell it, you can feel it, and yet it only few can ever speak of it. If it is voiced it always seems that the spell is broken. There are instances where it can be mentioned and those who are not there can see a glimpse of the world. But it’s a world that can hardly be spoken of, for if you speak it becomes hollow, empty, and ruined. It’s a world that can be written and dreamed of, and entered any time you wish… if… But there’s no door, and only those who have a key can enter. Those who have it know they do. The key can’t be described. You cannot be told what it is, and it can’t be given to you. But for those few who have it, this world is always open, always it’s there. It’s ever in existence, though at times it seems farther or closer. More real or less real, but never gone.

Muchlys...

2009-12-31T14:50:00.000-08:00

If you don’t understand this, that’s ok, I guess it’s sort of an inside joke...but if you get it you should really get it!! :)

One day we discovered a land inside the world of insanity, this land is inhabited by the Muchlys. The Muchlys are divided into two classes. Pretty Muchlys and ugly Muchlys.

Some interesting facts discovered about the Muchlys are:
Their favorite vegetable is okies.
The expression ‘Oh Vista!’ is used when they are irritated.
‘kk’ and ‘prolly’ are their two most common words in speech. And ‘yup’ is their single affirmative word.
One comical habit of the Muchlys is putting signs on their doors such as ‘here’, ‘away’, or ‘be right back’. The funny thing is that even when they put ‘away’ and ‘be right back’ signs on their doors, you can almost always knock and find them still at home… and happy to talk with you.
The only foreign word that the Muchlys know is ja. Due to the fact that ja is the only foreign with which they are familiar it takes on multiple spellings such as ja, jah or ya.
Another peculiar habit of the Muchlys is that after they make a declaration of going to bed it is anywhere from thirty minutes to two hours before they actually head that direction.
‘Ornot’ is the term the Muchlys’ use when they have said something, but disagree and agree with it at the same time.
Two other interesting traits of the Muchlys are the first being that they stick their tongues out at people all the time, though this action is used as a gag or joke with no negative connotations, and the other being that whenever they find something funny they almost always laugh aloud.
When they find something disagreeable or not to their liking they say ‘hahaha’ or ‘oh....’ in the driest manner you have ever heard.
A very common sight to see among the Muchlys is when they all of a sudden roll around on the floor and laugh so hard that they start crying. The curious thing about these incidents is that the Muchlys are in such a state for no more than two seconds and then they return to their former composed conversation.
Another fascinating talent of the Muchlys is the ability to carry on multiple, coherent, and deep conversations at the same time and everyone with whom they are conversing can understand them.
But the most distinctive factor of the Muchlys’ culture is their famous word… ISH. Ish might mean anything from ‘sort of’ to ‘that’s right’ to ‘maybe’ to ‘I’m not sure, but I’ll say it anyway’. Though no one remembers the exact date, ish was declared a world in the land of Muchlys when they decided that they were tired of it being simply a suffix.

Ray of Hope Again....

2009-12-29T19:44:00.000-08:00

Someone’s crying

Can’t you hear the pain

Something inside is breaking

And it might not heal again

Lost and hopeless

Where to go from here

No reason to try again

‘cause there was nothing else clear

She just fell apart

Had nothing else to give

Ev’ry vision had shattered

Without a cause left to live

Just a prisoner

She alone to blame

Her whole heart in shambles

And her soul was held in chains

Someone’s crying

Can’t you hear the pain

Something inside is breaking

The future is gone again

Doors closed and bolted

Lights had been shut off

The darkness was oppressive

And she couldn’t shake it off

Now she was empty

And without a plan

Now was the time to claim her

Lift her gently by the hand

The Savior then arrived

Caught her tenderly

Wrapped His arms around her

Said “I’ve come to set you free”

“You’re not forgotten

I will take your place”

Then He whispered in her ear

“This is love and perfect grace”

Someone’s crying

Can’t you hear the pain

Something inside is breaking

Jesus will heal it again

He said He loved her

And would take her blame

At first she was suspicious

It was such a wild claim

Then she saw His scars

And remembered now

Stories of a God who died

And she’d been told just how

Slowly she gave in

Then she broke down

And her heart gave way to tears

From the strain of what this crowned

But then she was filled

By a sense of fervent hope

Her burdens then were lifted

Her life had a whole new scope

Someone’s crying

Can’t you hear the pain

Something inside is breaking

Yet there’s a ray of hope again

...Yet there’s a ray of hope again

Approved to God

2009-12-19T10:01:00.000-08:00

"Be diligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who does not need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth." 2 Timothy 2:15

If you cannot express yourself well on each of your beliefs, work and study until you can. If you don’t, other people may miss out on the blessings that come from knowing the truth. Try to re-express a truth of God to yourself clearly and understandably, and God will use that same explanation when you share it with someone else. But you must be willing to go through God’s winepress where the grapes are crushed. You must struggle, experiment, and rehearse your words to express God’s truth clearly. Then the time will come when that very expression will become God’s wine of strength to someone else. But if you are not diligent and say, “I’m not going to study, and struggle to express this truth in my own words; I’ll just borrow my words from someone else,” then the words will be of little or no value to you or to others. Try to state to yourself what you believe to be the absolute truth of God, and you will be allowing God the opportunity to pass it on through you to someone else. Always make it a practice to stir your own mind thoroughly to think through what you have easily believed. Your position is not really yours until you make it yours through suffering and study. The author or speaker from whom you learn the most is not the one who teaches you something you didn’t know before, but the one who helps you take a truth with which you have quietly struggled, give it expression, and speak it clearly and boldly.

(from My Utmost for His Highest)

The Children's Story... part VIII

2009-11-22T16:51:00.000-08:00

"Yes, Johnny, you're quite right. You're a very, very wise boy. Children, I put the candy on your desks. So you know that it doesn't matter whom you ask, whom you shut your eyes and 'pray' to -- to God or anyone, even Our Leader -no one will give you anything. Only another human being." She looked at Danny. "God didn't give you the puppy you wanted. But if you work hard, I will. Only I or someone like me can GIVE you things. Praying to God or anything or anyone for something is a waste of time."
"Then we don't say prayers? We're not supposed to say prayers?"
The puzzled children watched her.
"You can if you want to, children. If your daddies and mommies want you to. But we know, you and I that it means nothing. That's our secret."
"My dad says it's wrong to have secrets from him."
"But he has secrets that he shares with your mommy and not with you, doesn't he?"
All the children nodded.
"Then it's not wrong for us to have a few secrets from them. Is it?"
"I like having secrets. Hilda and me have lots of secrets." Mary said.
The New Teacher said, "We're going -to have lots of wonderful secrets together. You can eat your candy if you want to. And because Johnny was especially clever, I think we should make him monitor for the whole week, don't you?"

They all nodded happily and popped the candy into their mouths and chewed gloriously. Johnny was very proud as he chewed his candy, he decided that he liked his teacher very much. Because she told the truth. Because she was right about fear. Because she was right about God. He'd prayed many times for many things and never got them, and even the one time he did get the skates, he knew his dad had heard him and had put them under his bed for his birthday and pretended he hadn't heard him. I ALWAYS WONDERED WHY HE DIDN'T LISTEN, AND ALL THE TIME HE WASN'T THERE, he thought.

Johnny sat back contentedly, resolved to work hard and listen and not to have wrong thoughts like Dad.

The teacher waited for them to finish their candy. This was what she had been trained for, and she knew that she would teach her children well and that they would grow up to be good citizens. She looked out of the window, at the sun over the land. It was a good land, and vast. A land to breathe in. But she was warmed not by the sun but by the thought that throughout the school and throughout the land all children, all men and all women were being taught with the same faith, with variations of the same procedures. Each according to his age group. Each according to his need.
She glanced at her watch....

It was 9:23.

The Children's Story... part VII

2009-11-16T18:43:00.000-08:00

The children all promised. They were very happy. Jenny said, "But first we got to say our prayers. Before we go to sleep."
The new Teacher smiled at her. "Of course. Perhaps we should say a prayer now. In some schools that's a custom too." She thought a moment and the faces watched her. Then she said, "let's pray. But let's pray for something very good. What should we pray for?"
"Bless Momma and Daddy." Danny said immediately.
"That's a good idea, Danny. I have one. Let's pray for candy. That's a good idea, isn't it?"
They all nodded happily.
So, following their New Teacher, they all closed their eyes and steepled their hands together, and they prayed with her for candy.
The New Teacher opened her eyes and looked around disappointedly. "but where's our candy. God is all-seeing and everywhere, and if we pray, He answers our prayers. Isn't that true.?"
"I prayed for a puppy of my own lots of times, but I never got one," Danny said.
"Maybe we didn't pray hard enough. Perhaps we should kneel down like it' s done in church.
So the new Teacher knelt and all the children knelt and they prayed very, very hard. But there was still no candy.

Because the New Teacher was disappointed, the children were very disappointed. Then she said, "perhaps we're using the wrong name." She thought a moment and then said, "instead of saying 'God,' let's say 'Our Leader.' Let's pray to Our Leader for candy. Let's pray very hard and don't open your eyes till I say."
So the children shut their eyes tightly and prayed very hard, and as they prayed, the New Teacher took out some candy from her pocket and quietly put a piece on each child's desk. She did not notice Johnny -- alone of all the children -- watching her through his half-closed eyes.
She went softly back to her desk and the prayer ended, and the children opened their eyes and they stared at the candy and they were overjoyed.
"I'm going to pray to Our Leader every time," Mary said excitedly.
"Me too," Hilda said. "Could we eat Our Leader's candy now, teacher?"
"Oh, let's, please, please, please."
"So Our Leader answered your prayers, didn't he?"
"I saw you put the candy on our desks!" Johnny burst out. "I SAW YOU... I didn't close my eyes, and I saw you. You had 'em in your pocket. We didn't get them with praying. YOU put them there."
All the children, appalled, stared at him and then at their New Teacher. She stood at the front of the class and looked back at Johnny and then at all of them.

The Maid to My Mind...

2009-11-03T07:57:00.000-08:00

I read this somewhere else and decided to post it here. It was written in a Ladies magazine from 1776. It is written from the perspective from a young man and I think it's very well done. Young women should aspire to the godly character qualities of "the maid" and this is also a reminder that others notice how we act and who we are. Character is important.

I'm a youth in my mind and if people say true

Have virtue sufficient good manners my due

Content in my station, such graces combined

Might sure render happy, the maid to my mind

If my choice should be granted, I freely confess

I ne'er could like one who's a slave to her dress

Though pleasing her beauty, her whit unrefined

Would prevent her from being the maid to my mind

Nor she that doth practice the patch and the paint

Whose heart is deceit though she looks like a saint

If ever so rich, since to nature unkind

I never would choose her for the maid to my mind

Above all the fair sex my contempt would set

On her who is surely a finished coquette

For as pride and conceit keep fair virtue confined

She could never please me as the maid to my mind

Then to banter no longer, but to end your suspense

I like one of prudence, good nature and sense

And coy to a fop to sincerity kind

In peace then I'd live with the maid to my mind

Her age and the size in her person should be

In neither superior, but equal to me

Her dress not to rich, yet to neatness inclined

Then this and no others the maid to my mind

Her shape should be handsome and graceful her air

So charming her features both lovely and fair

With these a fair portion by fortune entwined

Would make her completely the maid to my mind

Sound heaven but attend to my prayer and request

To make her my wife I should be so blessed

That the world might see hence that I never once repined

At choosing for life the fair maid to my mind

The Children's Story... part VI

2009-11-03T06:37:00.001-08:00

The New Teacher got up from her seat and walked the length of the room and the children's eyes followed her, and Johnny stood, knees of jelly. She sat down on his seat and put her hands on his shoulders, and his shoulders were shaking like his knees.
"He's going to a school. Some grown-ups have to go to school as well as children."

"But they took him away and he didn't want to go." Johnny felt the tears close and he fought them back.
The New Teacher touched him gently, and he smelled the youth and cleanness of her, and it was not the smell of home which was sour and just a little dirty. “He's no different from all of you. YOU sometimes don't want to go to school. With grown-ups it's the same - just the same as children. Would you like to visit him? He has a holiday in a few days."
"Momma said that Dad's gone away forever!" Johnny stared at her incredulously. "He has a holiday?"
The New Teacher laughed. "She's wrong, Johnny. After all, everyone who goes to school has holidays. That's fair, isn't it?"
The children shifted and rustled and watched. And Johnny said, "I can see him?"
"Of course. Your daddy just has to go back to school a little. He had some strange thoughts, and he wanted other grown-ups to believe them. It's not right to want others to believe wrong thoughts, is it?"
"Well, no, I suppose not. But my dad never thought nothing bad."
"Of course, Johnny. I said WRONG thoughts -- not BAD thoughts. There's nothing wrong with that. But it's right to show grown-ups right thoughts when they're wrong, isn't it?"
"Well, yes," Johnny said. "But what wrong thoughts did he have?"
"Just some grown-up thoughts that are old-fashioned. We're going to learn all about them in class. Then we can share knowledge, and I can learn from you as you will learn from me. Shall we?"
"All right." Johnny stared at her, perplexed. "My dad couldn't have wrong thoughts. He just couldn't.... Could he?"

"Well, perhaps sometime when you wanted to talk about something very important to your dad, perhaps he said, 'Not now, Johnny, I'm busy,' or, 'We'll talk about that tomorrow.' That's a bad thought -- not to give you time when it's important. Isn't it?"
"Sure. but that's what all grown-ups do."
"My momma says that all the time," Mary said.
And the other children nodded, and they wondered if all their parents should go back to school and unlearn bad thoughts.

"Sit down, Johnny, and we'll start learning good things and not worry about grown-up bad thoughts. Oh, yes," she said when she sat down at her seat again, brimming with happiness, "I have a lovely surprise for you. You're all going to stay overnight with us. We have a lovely room with beds and lots of food, and we'll all tell stories and have such a lovely time."
"Oh, good," the children said.
"Can I stay up till eight o'clock?" Mary asked breathlessly.
"Well, as it's our first new day, we'll all stay up to eight-thirty. But only if you promise to go right to sleep afterward."

The Children's Story... part V

2009-10-28T18:39:00.001-07:00

The children pondered what to do with it, and the idea that pleased them most was to push it out of the window. They watched excitedly as the New Teacher opened the window and allowed them to throw it into the playground. They shrieked with excitement as they saw it bounce on the ground and lie there. They began to love this strange New Teacher.

When they were all back in their seats the new Teacher said, "Well, before we start our lessons, perhaps there are some questions you want me to answer. Ask me anything you like. That's only fair, isn't it, if I ask you questions?"
Mary said, after a silence, "We never got to ask our real teacher ANY questions."
"You can always ask me anything. That's 8 the fair way. The new way. Try me."
"What's your name?" Danny asked.
She told them her name, and it sounded pretty.
Mary put up her hand. "Why do you wear those clothes? Well, it's like a sort of uniform nurses wear."
"We think that teachers should be dressed the same. Then you always know a teacher. It's nice and light and easy to iron. Do you like the color?"
"Oh, yes," Mary said. "You've got green eyes too.
"If you like, children, as a very special surprise, you can all have this sort of uniform. Then you won't have to worry about what you have to wear to school every day. And you'll all be the same."
The children twisted excitedly in their seats. Mary said, "But it'll cost a lot, and my momma won't want to spend the money 'cause we have to buy food and food is expen-- Well, it sort of costs a lot of money."
"They will be given to you. As a present. There's no need to worry about money."
Johnny said, "I don't want to be dressed like that."
"You don't have to accept a present, Johnny. Just because the other children want to wear new clothes, you don't have to," the new Teacher said.

Johnny slunk back in his chair. I'M NEVER GOING TO WEAR THEIR CLOTHES, he said to himself. I DON'T CARE IF I'M GOING TO LOOK DIFFERENT FROM DANNY AND TOM AND FRED.

Then Mary asked, "Why was our teacher crying?"
"I suppose she was just tired and needed a rest. She's going to have a long rest." She smiled at them. "We think teachers should be young. I'm nineteen."
"Is the war over now?" Danny asked.
"Yes, Danny, isn't that wonderful! Now all your daddies will be home soon."

"Did we win or did we lose?" Mary asked.
"We - that's you and I and all of us - WE won."

"Oh!"
The children sat back happily.
Then Johnny's hatred burst. "Where's my dad? What've you done to my dad? Where's my dad?"

The Children's Story... part IV

2009-10-16T14:22:00.000-07:00

So the children sat down and waited expectantly.
"What did your other teacher tell you that it meant?"
After a long silence Danny put up his hand. "She never said nothing, miss."

One of my teachers at the other school I went to before this one," Joan said in a rush, "well, she sort of said what it all meant, at least she said some thing about it just before recess one day and then the bell went and afterwards we had spellin'."
Danny said, "Miss Worden - well, she never told us. We just hadta learn it and then say it, that's all. Our real teacher didn't say anything at all."
All the children nodded. Then they waited again.
"Your teacher never explained to you?" All the children shook their heads.

"I don't think that was very good. Not to explain. You can always ask me anything. That's what a real teacher should do." Then the New Teacher said, "But didn't you ask your daddies and mommies?"
"Not about 'I pledge.' We just hadta learn it," Mary said. "Once I could say it, Daddy gave me a nickel for saying it good."
"That's right," Danny said. "So long as you could say it all, it was very good. But I never got no nickel."
"Did you ask each other what it meant?"
"I askt Danny once and he didn't know and none of us knowed really. It's grown-up talk, and grown-ups talk that sort of words. We just havta learn it."

"The other schools I went to," Hilda said, "they never said anything about it. They just wanted us to learn it. They didn't ask us what it meant. We just hadta say it every day before we started school."
"It took me weeks and weeks and weeks to say it right," Mary said.
So the New Teacher explained what allegiance meant. " ...so you are promising or pledging support to the flag and saying that it is much more important than YOU are. How can a flag be more important than a real live person?"
Johnny broke the silence. "But the next thing is - well, where it says 'and to the republic for which it stands.' That means it's like a, like a..." He searched for the word and could not find it. "Like well, sort of a sign, isn't it?"
"Yes. The real word is a SYMBOL." The New Teacher frowned. "But we don't need a sign to remind us that we love our country, do we? You're all good boys and girls. Do you need a sign to remind you?"
"What's REMIND mean?" Mary asked.
"It means to make you remember. To make you remember that you're all good boys and girls."
The children thought about this and shook their heads.

Johnny put up his hand. "It's our flag," he said fiercely. "We always pledge."
"Yes," the New Teacher said. "It is a very pretty one. She looked at it a moment and then said, "I wish I could have a piece of it. If it's so important, I think we should all have a piece of it. Don't you?"
"I've a little one at home," Mary said. "I could bring it tomorrow."
"Thank you, Mary dear, but I just wanted a little piece of this one because it's our own special classroom one."
Then Danny said, "If we had some scissors we could cut a little piece off."
"I've some scissors at home, Mary said.

"There's some in Miss Worden's desk," Brian said.

The New Teacher found the scissors and then they had to decide who would be allowed to cut a little piece off, and the New Teacher said that because today was Mary's birthday (HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?) Mary asked herself, awed) Mary should be allowed to cut the piece off. And then they decided it would be very nice if they all had a piece. The flag is special, they thought, so if you have a piece, that's better than having just to look at it, 'cause you can keep it in your pocket.
So the flag was cut up by the children and they were very proud that they each had a piece. But now the flagpole was bare and strange.
And useless.

The Day I Achieved Status of ..............................Driver

2009-10-13T12:07:00.000-07:00

Yup, so today I officially got my driver's license.

I went and took the test, which I don't think is good enough, and passed! Then I went to the license bureau, and come to find out since I'm only so many weeks from turning 18 I went straight from my permit to the Under 21 Full Driver License, and skipped the Intermediate License completely!

The Children's Story... part III

2009-10-08T17:44:00.000-07:00

"Now," said the New Teacher, "what shall we do? I know, we'll play a game. I'll try and guess your names!"
The children, wide-eyed, shifted in their seats. Miss Worden never did this, and often she called a child by another's name. THE NEW TEACHER'LL NEVER KNOW ALL OUR NAMES! NEVER! they thought. So they waited excitedly while the New Teacher turned her attention to Sandra. Oh, yes, somehow she already knew Sandra's name, but how could she possibly know everyone's? They waited, glad that they were going to catch out the New Teacher.
But they were not to catch her out. The New Teacher remembered every name.

Johnny put up his hand. "How'd you know our names? I mean, well, we haven't had a roll call or anything, so how'd you know our names?"
"That's easy, Johnny," the New Teacher said. "You all sit in the same places every day. Each desk has one pupil. So I learned your names from a list. I had to work for three whole days to remember your names. A teacher must work very hard to be a good teacher, and so I worked for three days so that I could know each of you the first day. That's very important, don't you think, for a teacher to work hard?"

Johnny frowned and half-nodded and sat down and wondered why he hadn't figured that out for himself before asking, astonished that she had worked three days just to know everyone the first day. But still he hated her.
"Johnny. Would you tell me something, please? How do you start school? I mean what do you do to begin with?"
Johnny stood reluctantly. "We first pledge allegiance and then we sing the song -"
"Yes, but that's all after roll call," Sandra said, "You forgot roll call.
"Yes, You forgot roll call, Johnny," Mary said.
"First we have roll call," Johnny said. Then he sat down.
The New Teacher smiled. "All right. but we really don't need roll call. I know all your names and I know everyone's here. It's very lazy for a teacher not to know who's here and who isn't, don't you think? After all, a teacher should KNOW. So we don't need roll call while I'm your teacher. So we should pledge, isn't that next?"

Obediently all the children got up and put their hands on their hearts and the New Teacher did the same, and they began in unison, 'I pledge allegiance to the flag of -"
"Just a moment," the New Teacher said. "What does PLEDGE mean?"

The children stood openmouthed; Miss Worden had never interrupted them before. They stood and stared at the New Teacher. Wordless. And silent.

"What does ALLEGIANCE mean?" The New Teacher asked, her hand over her heart.

The children stood in silence. Then Mary put up her hand. "Well, PLEDGE is, ah, well, something like - sort of when you want to do something very good. You sort of pledge you're going to do something like not suck your thumb 'cause that makes your teeth bend and you'll have to wear a brace and go to the dentist, which hurts."
"That's very good, Mary. Very, very good. To pledge means to promise. And ALLEGIANCE?"
Mary shrugged helplessly and looked at her best friend, Hilda, who looked back at her and then at the teacher and shrugged helplessly too.

The New Teacher waited, and the silence hung in the room, hurting. then she said, "I think it's quite wrong for you to have to say something with long words in it if you don't understand what you're saying."

The Children's Story... part II

2009-10-05T18:55:00.000-07:00

(by James Clavell)

"Good morning, children, I'm your new teacher," the New Teacher said. Then she closed the door softly and walked to the teacher's desk, and the children in the front row felt and smelled the perfume of her - clean and fresh and young - and as she passed Sandra who sat at the end of the first row she said, "Good morning, Sandra," and Sandra flushed deeply and wondered, aghast, with all the other children, HOW DID SHE KNOW MY NAME? and her heart raced in her chest and made it feel tight and very heavy.

The teacher got up shakily. "I, er, I - good morning." Her words were faltering. She, too, was trying to get over the shock. And nausea.

"Hello, Miss Worden," the New Teacher said. "I'm taking over your class now. You are to go to the principal's office."
"Why? What's going to happen to me? What's going to happen to my children?" The words gushed from Miss Worden, and a lank piece of hair fell into her eyes. The children were agonized by the cut to her voice, and one or two of them felt the edge of tears.
"He just wants to talk to you, Miss Worden," the New Teacher said gently. "You really must take better care of yourself. You shouldn't be so upset."
Miss Worden saw the New Teacher's smile but she wasn't touched by its compassion. She tried to stop her knees from shaking. "Good-bye, children," she said. The Children made no reply. they were too terrified by the sound of her voice and the tears that wet her face. And because she was crying, some of the children cried, and Sandra fled to her.

The New Teacher shut the door behind Miss Worden and turned back into the room, cradling Sandra in her arms. "Children, children, there's no need to cry!" she said. "I know, I'll sing you a song! Listen!"

And she sat down on the floor as gracefully as an angel, Sandra in her arms, and she began to sing and the children stopped crying because Miss Worden never, never sang to them and certainly never sat on the floor, which is the best place to sit, as everyone in the class knew. They listened spellbound to the happy lilt of the New Teacher's voice and to the strange words of a strange tongue which soared and dipped like the sea of grass that was the birthplace of the song. It was a child's song, and it soothed them, and after she had sung the first chorus the New Teacher told them the story of the song.
It was about two children who had lost their way and were all alone in the great grass prairies and were afraid, but they met a fine man riding a fine horse and the man told them that there was never a need to be afraid, for all they had to do was the watch the stars and the stars would tell them where their home was.
"For once you know the right direction, then there's never a need to be afraid. Fear is something that comes from inside, from inside your tummies," the New Teacher said radiantly, "and good strong children like you have to put food in your tummies. Not fear."

The children thought about this and it seemed very sensible. The New Teacher sang the song again, and soon all the children were happy and calm once more. Except Johnny. He hated her even though he knew she was right about fear.

made 30 on the 30th!

2009-10-05T18:52:00.000-07:00

random blog post... I put up my 30th blog post on the 30th of September. I had a couple other matches like that too, but I will not have any more! :( lol I just thought the coincidence was kinda funny!

The Children's Story... part I

2009-09-30T14:06:00.000-07:00

I would like to challenge anyone who reads this to not rush through it, but take a moment, and really think about what this story is saying. I think it was excellently written! I will post it in several installments...seeing as it's not short enough for one post.

The Children's Story by James Clavell

The teacher was afraid.

And the children were afraid. All except Johnny. He watched the classroom door with hate. He felt the hatred deep within his stomach. It gave him strength.

It was two minutes to nine.

The teacher glanced numbly from the door and stared at the flag which stood in a corner of the room. But she couldn't see the flag today. She was blinded by her terror, not only for herself but mostly for them, her children. She had never had children of her own. She had never married.
In the mists of her mind she saw the rows upon rows of children she had taught through her years. Their faces were legion. But she could distinguish no one particular face. Only the same face which varied but slightly. Always the same age or thereabouts. Seven. Perhaps a boy, perhaps a girl. And the face always open and ready for the knowledge that she was to give. The same face staring at her, open, waiting and full of trust.

The children rustled, watching her, wondering what possessed her. They saw not the gray hair and the old eyes and the lined face and the well-worn clothes. They saw only their teacher and the twisting of her hands. Johnny looked away from the door and watched with the other children. He did not understand anything except that the teacher was afraid, and because she was afraid she was making them all worse and he wanted to shout that there was no need to fear. "Just because THEY'VE conquered us there's no need for panic fear," Dad had said. "Don't be afraid, Johnny. If you fear too much, you'll be dead even though you're alive."

The sound of footsteps approached and then stopped. The door opened.

The children gasped. They had expected an ogre or giant or beast or witch or monster - like the outer-space monsters you think about when the lights are out and Mommy and Daddy have kissed you good night and you're frightened and you put your head under the cover and all at once you're awake and it's time for school. But instead of a monster, a beautiful young girl stood in the doorway. Her clothes were neat and clean, all olive green - even her shoes. But most important, she wore a lovely smile, and when she spoke, she spoke without the trace of an accent. The children found this very strange, for THEY were foreigners from a strange country far across the sea. They had all been told about THEM.

12 Days of Homeschooling...+2!

2009-09-30T14:02:00.000-07:00

On the first day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "Can you homeschool legally?"

On the second day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "Are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the third day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "Do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the fourth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "What about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the fifth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the sixth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "How long will you homeschool, YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the seventh day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "Look at what they're missing, how long will you homeschool, YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the eighth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "Why do you do this, look at what they're missing, how long will you homeschool, YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the ninth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "They'll miss the prom, why do you do this, look at what they're missing, how long will you homeschool, YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the tenth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "What about graduation, they'll miss the prom, why do you do this, look at what they're missing, how long will you homeschool, YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the eleventh day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "I could never do that, what about graduation, they'll miss the prom, why do you do this, look at what they're missing, how long will you homeschool, YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

On the twelfth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "Can they go to college, I could never do that, what about graduation, they'll miss the prom, why do you do this, look at what they're missing, how long will you homeschool, YOU ARE SO STRANGE, what about P.E., do you give them tests, are they socialized, can you homeschool legally?"

And two extra!

On the thirteenth day of homeschool I thoughtfully replied: "They can go to college, yes you can do this, they can have graduation, we don't like the prom, we do it `cuz we like it, they are missing nothing, we'll homeschool forever, WE ARE NOT STRANGE!, we give them P.E., and we give them tests, they are socialized, AND WE HOMESCHOOL LEGALLY!

On the fourteenth day of homeschool my neighbor said to me, "How can I get started, why didn't you tell me, where do I buy curriculum, when is the next conference, WILL PEOPLE THINK WE'RE STRANGE?, I think we can do this, if you will help us, we will join a sports team and we'll homeschool legally."

Thoughts for homemaking...

2009-09-30T13:49:00.000-07:00

I don't remember where I found these questions, but I thought they were good. They could be very helpful as a general list for things a homemaker can do when she feels like she's bored or pointless at the moment, and would help her to develop her home into a more special and lovely place. Not only that, but those of us who are done with high school and not yet in homes of our own can take it to heart and apply it to where we are. Who says we can't beautify our homes, bedrooms, etc.? Who says Mother has to do all the little extra things around the house, why can't we? Can't we do things to encourage Daddy when he comes home and bless Mother because she doesn't have enough time in her day? Some of these are simply everyday or weekly tasks that need to be done, but others are just as necessary yet they never seem to be something we get around to. I am challenging all of us young women/homemakers...take these questions and apply what you can to your life and home. Let's see if it isn't helpful and encouraging!

1. Do you have a morning routine in the house?
2. Are your dishes washed and put away?
3. Is your cabinet top clear?
4. Is your table clear, when not dining, and do you have a centerpiece?
5. Have you cleaned your cupboards and storage areas and fridge in the last 3 months?
6. Is your porch clean and the entry way cheerful for visitors or people who see it from the road?
7. Are your carpets clean?
8. Is your floor clean?
9. Is your living room ready for company?
10. Is your laundry washed, folded, ironed and put away? (Keep in mind, I am not saying you have to do this. I am only listing it in case you think you have time to bring in another income!)
11. Is your mending and button replacement caught up?
12. Do you bake bread? (Once again, no one HAS to do it, but if a woman is bored, maybe she should bake her bread. It takes more time. It smells wonderful. It has far greater effects than can be listed here, both emotionally and physically or even involving childhood memory)
13. Is your bathroom shining clean and does it smell nice?
14. Does your house smell nice?
15. Have you re-decorated or re-arranged in the last 3 years? (You need not do it, but if you think you need to go to work or take on extra work earning money at home, why not put the time into re-beautifying your house?)
16. Are your beds made? Are your sheets and bedding fresh?
17. Do you hang your clothes on the line? (You needn’t, but it takes more time, and is good for your health and it actually increases the life of your sheets and clothes, as opposed to the dryer)
18. Do you grow a garden, or even a tomato in a pot?
19. Are your drawers and storage areas organized?
20. Are your photos organized?
21. Are your computer files organized?
22. Is your correspondence caught up?
23. Do you make any of your own clothes?
24. Does your husband/father ever have to ask for an ironed shirt?
25. Are your books organized?
26. Do you go through your things regularly for garage sales?
27. Are your windows clean?
28. Do you cook regular meals from basic ingredients?
29. Have you had anyone over for tea in the last month?
30. Do you read at least one good book or learn something new within the year?

Dying to Self...

2009-09-30T13:47:00.000-07:00

To all who may be going through trials at this time. Our prayers are answered by God in His timing; Rejoice, because they have been answered! "Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, rejoice. Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” ~Phil.2:3-4; 4:4-7

Dethrone the King: Dying to Self

When you are forgotten or neglected or purposely set at naught, and don't sting or hurt with the insult or oversight, but your heart is happy; being counted worthy to suffer for Christ-that is dying to self.

When your good is spoken evil of, when your wishes are crossed, your advice disregarded or opinion ridiculed, you refuse to let anger rise in your heart or even to defend yourself but take it all in patient, loving silence- that is dying to self.

When you lovingly, patiently bear any disorder and irregularity, any unpunctuality or any annoyance; when you come face to face with waste, folly, extravagance, spiritual insensitivity, and endure it just as Jesus endured it-that is dying to self.

When you're content with any food, any offering, any raiment, any climate, any society, any solitude, any interruption by the will of God- that is dying to self.

When you never refer to yourself in conversation, or record your own good works, or itch after commendation, when you can truly love to go unknown- that is dying to self.

When you can see your brother or sister have his or her needs met and can honestly rejoice in spirit and can feel no envy nor question God, while your own needs are far greater and in more desperate circumstances- that is dying to self.

When you can receive correction and reproof from one of less stature than yourself and can humbly submit inwardly as well as outwardly, finding no rebellion or resentment rising up within your heart- that is dying to self.

(once again this is not my work, it came from a friend)

Funny poetry due to indecision on what to write!

2009-09-29T07:48:00.000-07:00

KEYS TO THE CUISINART

I saw a chef on television
Make a dish called Wiener Schnitzel
And what he had to tell us
Was a time consuming ritual

Most of the work he’d done before
He ever got on the air
For he pulled out a tray of pork loins
So thin they would almost tear

He told us they come one inch thick
And he’d pounded them down to a quarter
We never got to see him clobber
The loins to make them shorter

I went out and bought the boneless chops
And yes they were one inch thick
By the time I pounded one of them
The violence made me sick

It also took me seven minutes
To make it a quarter inch
And I had five more loins to pound
I was really in a pinch

I put the loins in zip lock bags
I didn’t have to go very far
For I lay them down in the drive-way
And backed over them with the car

To my delight, the meat smashed down
In the time it takes to sneeze
And from that day on I’ve used my car
As a prep-chef if you please

For in a craze of creativity
I thought of other foods
My sturdy Michelin tires
Could turn into processed goods

Graham crackers smash up nicely
Into crumbs for chocolate pies
Nuts can be chopped when needed
And tough meats can be tenderized

The bottom line is simple
And I’ve taken it to heart
God bless my little SUV
It’s replaced my Cusinart

(no, I did not write this one, sorry!)

Worldviews...the difference...

2009-09-21T18:30:00.001-07:00

I observed, once again, something very interesting as I went over the cards I received for my graduation. There were a great variety of styles and messages, but the great thing that struck me was the differing worldview of the cards. Those that were clearly a Christian worldview, and those that sadly were not. By that, I mean that when I read them I observed the difference in the messages and the significance placed on different aspects of life, faith, me, success, etc. I was saddened by the influence of the world that came through in the cards I received even from Christians, and of course it was sad to see that in those who are not Christians. I wanted to share what I noticed. My comments are in brackets.

~~~~~
Your talents, imagination, and hard work
are really something to admire... You've
put your gifts to good use and given yourself
and those who love you many reasons
to be proud. Someone so capable and
generous deserves to feel the warm glow
of success that the future is sure to bring.

[I don't deserve anything on my own, honestly. By myself
nothing I have done deserves success.]

~~~~~
"If" for Graduates
If you can value
all the simple joys in each new day,
If you can see the gift
in everything life brings your way,
If you can find your strength
and all your answers deep within,
If you can trust yourself enough
to let your dreams begin,
If you can learn and grow
from every challenge that you face,
If you can know each moment
is the perfect time and place...
If you can recognize yourself
in others' hopes and fears,
If you can feel compassion for your own and others' tears,
If you believe that you can help
to shape the world you see,
If you can sense that you create
your own reality,
If you can comfort someone else
and be a caring friend,
If you can be a person
on who others can depend...
If you can live life fully
and enjoy it heart and soul,
If you can just accept
the twists and turns you can't control,
If you can show integrity
in every choice you make--
Then your journey will be filled with joy,
whichever paths you take.

Whatever your choices, whatever you do,
Hope the years bring success and adventure to you!

[Find answers within me, create my own reality...that
is sadly an autonomous worldview]

~~~~~
Knowledge is the power that gives us wings to soar...
You've learned a lot
and achieved so much...worked hard
and maintained your focus...met challenges
with character and a strong will.
That's how success is won.

[if God is in the picture and the Source of everything]

~~~~~
Success always means
more when it happens
to someone who
has truly earned it...
You should feel so proud.
You set yourself a goal,
and you overcame all obstacles
until you achieved it.

Heather, congratulations on your graduation.
Go to the best college you can afford and study
something that you enjoy and will bring you
fulfillment in your life. Good luck!

[Me? How have I earned success...I have failed
in so many ways and if it wasn't for Christ I would
have no reason to hope life would be any different
I ought not search for something in life, but rather
the Lord as my fulfillment and hope!]

And then comes there were those which came with a totally different focus in the message.

~~~~
Graduation is a wonderful time
to reflect on the many blessings
that God has given you.
You're a very special person...
and as surely as God has blessed your past,
may He also bless your future.

[God has indeed blessed me! Beyond what I deserve]

~~~~~
Follow in God's footsteps
in your Journey through life...
Believe in God and yourself
and you will achieve...
Your passion, hopes
and deepest dreams

May the Lord bless you as you continue to lean on Him!

[it is so refreshing, encouraging to receive notes
like this, knowing people are challenging me
where it really counts]

~~~~~
Wishing you a future filled with limitless opportunities.

May our Heavenly Father guide
and keep you as you begin the next chapter of your life.

~~~~~
Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. ~Helen Keller
Live inspired

Congratulations, Heather! To God be the glory for the work you've accomplished thus far! May He lead and guide you always.

[amen, how exciting to realize the work the
Lord has done through such a flawed being
as myself and used it to His glory!]

~~~~~
Just continue to be the Christian that you are and the Lord will see to ALL your needs.

[He doesn't promises answers to desires,
wishes, dreams...but He does to needs...]

~~~~~
God created you...
every little detail about you.
He knows you better
and loves you more
than anyone ever could.
He is your wise Father
and faithful friend,
who takes great joy in you.
Celebrating you today
and hoping you remember
that God celebrates you every day!

[what joy it gives me to know that my
Lord, Sovereign and Creator REJOICES
in me!!!]

~~~~~
Trust in the Lord with
with all thine Heart...
in all thy ways
Acknowledge Him,
and He shall direct
thy Paths. ~Proverbs 3:5-6

God bless you
on your special day.
May He be your STRENGTH
and guiding LIGHT
as you venture
into the future,
and may He keep you
in His LOVE and CARE
always.

[How different indeed were the notes on these cards...some nice, but saddening (though I'm sure the desire when they were chosen was for encouragement) and then those that really uplift, challenge, encourage, and excite me...those that place the glory and praise where they are due and remind me of the attributes of my Father, how glorious He is and that He sees every detail of my life! There is indeed a difference between those who see God as their source and life and those who have no true source and life...how marked...how sad...how challenging that should be.]

Of books and reading...

2009-09-11T12:27:00.001-07:00

I picked this up off someone’s blog and thought it would be cool to fill out. I decided to post it here, since reading is one of my passions (hmm...I think I now want to go do a word study on that and see what it deep down really means...), and I would love to read how others fill this out!

(several of mine aren't necessarily "in order" in the categories)

Top 3 authors:

1. C.S. Lewis

2. Albert Marrin

3. G.A. Henty

(Why do I have to stop there? I can't really pick three...L.M. Montgomery, George MacDonald, Marguerite Henry, Kate Seredy, R.C. Sproul, etc.)

Top 3 male characters:

1. Randal Baltimore from The Reb and the Redcoats by Constance Savery

2. Nat from The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth Speare

3. Ian & Alister from The Highlander's Last Song by George MacDonald

Top 3 female characters:

1.Ester Reid from Ester Reid by Isabella MacDonald Alden

2. Anne Shirley from the Anne of Green Gables series by L. M. Montgomery

3.Elizabeth Bennet from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

Top 30 fiction books in no particular order:

1. The Highlander's Last Song by George MacDonald

2. Lad of Sunnybank by Albert Payson Terhune

3. The Reb and the Redcoats by Constance Savery

4. The Pansy Collection by Isabella MacDonald Alden

5. The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis

6. No Promises in the Wind by Irene Hunt

7. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

8. Mara, Daughter of the Nile by Eloise Jarvis McGraw

9. The Bronze Bow by Elizabeth Speare

10. Mara by Isabella MacDonald Alden

11. In His Steps by Charles M. Sheldon

12. Gaudenzia, Pride of the Palio by Marguerite Henry

13. The Chestry Oak by Kate Seredy

14. Little Women by Louisa May Alcott.

15. Jack and Jill by Louisa May Alcott.

16. Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery.

17. The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth Speare

18. The Crown and Covenant Series by Douglas Bond.

19. Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen.

20. G.A. Henty books (he has bunches of them)

21. Till We Have Faces by C.S. Lewis

22. Sir Gibbie by George MacDonald

23. Smoky the Cowhorse by James

24. Rebekah of Sunnybrook Farm by Kate Douglas Wiggin

25. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

26. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

27. King of the Wind by Marguerite Henry

28. The Good Master by Kate Seredy

29. Millions of Cats by Wanda Ga'g

30. The Story about Ping by Marjorie Flack

Top 3 books most recently read:

1. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

2. Redskin and Cowboy by G.A. Henty

3. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson

Worst 3 books ever read:

1. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson

2. Twelve Caesars by Gaius Suetonius Tranquillus

3. When No One Was Looking by Rosemary Wells

Top 5 scenes from any book:

1. Discovering how the Reb escaped, The Reb and the Redcoats

2. Ian and Alister's deep conversations, The Highlander's Last Song

3. When Clint finds Smoky again, Smoky the Cowhorse

4. Kit's trial, The Witch of Blackbird Pond

5. Midnight and Michael at the end, The Chestry Oak

The book(s) that made me cry the most:

1. Paula, the Waldensian by Eva Lecomte

2. Mara by Isabella MacDonald Alden

3. No Promises in the Wind Irene Hunt

4. All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque

5. Treasure in an Oatmeal Box by Ken Gire

The book(s) that made me laugh the most:

1. The Good Master by Kate Seredy

2. The Reb and the Redcoats by Constance Savery

3. The World of Pooh by A. A. Milne

The book(s) that made me feel the best at the end:

1. The Last Battle by C. S. Lewis

2. Smoky the Cowhorse by Will James

3. The Chestry Oak by Kate Seredy

4. The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare

5. Mara, Daughter of the Nile by Eloise Jarvis McGraw

Contemporary or Historical?

1. Almost always historical...but sometimes there are good contemporary books

Science Fiction, Fantasy, or Horror?

1. No horror, I don't know if I've actually read any science fiction... maybe only some fantasy

Hardback or Trade Paperback or Mass Market Paperback?

1. I like hardback best 'cause they last better, but I'm happy with a good deal on a paperback

Barnes & Noble or Amazon?

Amazon, I buy a lot from there.

Bookmark or Dog-ear?

Bookmark, never dog-ear! (That is the few times when I don't just look at the page number...and go back to it the next time I read)

Alphabetize by author, alphabetize by title, or organize not at all?

Well right now sort of categorized by group, but I don't have enough books of my own to really do that well

Star Wars or Star Trek?

Umm...never read any...

Keep, Throw Away, or Sell?

Keep ALL the good ones, throw away bad ones (why give junk to someone else?) and sell duplicates, etc.

Keep dust-jacket or toss it?

Keep it.

Read with dustjacket or remove it?

1. Depends on the book!

Little Women or Anne of Green Gables?

Anne of Green Gables...that wonderful imagination I can so relate to!

Short story or novel?

1. Both, but the short story has to be worthwhile, it has to be well written since there's not much to it. But I generally like longer books.

Stop reading when tired or at chapter breaks?

When I'm tired or have to go do something else. Chapter breaks only when that happens to be where I stop. (Btw, who reads chapter titles? I almost never do)

“It was a dark and stormy night” or “Once upon a time”?

Both...depends on the book

Tear Jerker or Belly Laugh?

Actually I like to get a good book that makes me cry because it's pretty hard to get me to do that in a book. I really like ones that are written in such a way as to draw me into the story that much. I do love a good laugh though.

Charlotte, Emily, or Anne Brontë?

Well...since I have only read Jane Eyre, and didn't like it, and I don't know which it was by, I haven't wanted to read more so I would say none.

Buy or Borrow?

Borrow if I’m checking it out, but I always want to buy books (anybody want to give me the money?)

Buying choice: Book Reviews, Recommendation, or Browse?

Recommendations and browsing, mostly.

Collection (short stories by the same author) or Anthology (short stories by different authors)?

Umm...I don't know, both?

Crane or Conrad?

The only Crane that I have read is The Red Badge of Courage, which was good, and I don't know Conrad.

Standalone or Series?

1. Both if they are good

Tidy ending or Cliffhanger?

Depends again on the book, sometimes both are good...then again sometimes both stink

Morning reading, afternoon reading, or nighttime reading?

Anytime! Duh!

Favorite genre series?

Umm... well I like the Crown and Covenant series, Elsie Dinsmore, The Kingdom Series, (how are you defining genre?)

New or used?

1. There is nothing like an old, worn cover…leaving you to wonder, who read this book before, the writing on the inside cover…timeless! I love a beautiful, new book too, but most books I like can't necessarily be found

Favorite book of which nobody else has heard?

The Highlander's Last Song by George MacDonald, The Reb and the Redcoats by Constance Savery, Till We Have Faces by C.S. Lewis (I have lots of favorites...but the "of which nobody else has heard" part makes it easier...a little bit...or maybe not really at all? I decided to stop at three)

Question God's wisdom?

2009-09-11T11:18:00.000-07:00

To question why the non-righteous is not punished by God is to question His wisdom. After all, this life is the only heaven they will ever experience.

"Surely, God will not act wickedly, and the Almighty will not pervert justice. Who gave Him authority over the earth? And who has laid on Him the whole world? Shall He recompense on your terms, because you have rejected it? For you must choose, and not I: therefore declare what you know..." Job 34:12-13, 33

To remember a beautiful and special dog...

2009-08-21T20:57:00.000-07:00

We met him one day as we were headed to swim in the creek...he was pretty, but he was dirty and covered in ticks and fleas, but of course we still wanted to pet him. Well, he was laying in the front yard when we got back home, and Daddy told us that if we were going to play with him then he needed a flea/tick bath. As we had been sitting out front petting him I commented that his coat looked like crushed up Oreos so we should name him...

Oreo

We put ads in the paper, but nobody came to claim him, so with us he stayed. He was the sweetest, gentlest dog. He would let my little sister hang on his collar when she crossed the yard after she had just learned to walk, and he'd stop when she fell down. We taught him to jump up with his front legs on a person's chest, but no matter how hard you tried you could never get him to jump up on a small child. Just a month ago some friends visited...and as sweet as ever he knew that he had to be gentle with the baby...he just knew

He almost never barks, and he is so friendly that Daddy said he would walk right up to a bad guy. But whenever we were out in the pasture with the cows and he thought they were too close then he would take off barking and chase them farther away. We joke about how Oreo would wag his back end off someday. When excited not only his docked tail wagged, it was literally his whole body. He was always happy to see us...he literally reveled in our attention. And he was just like a puppy. In the past few years he's slowed down a bit, but not much, and he always wanted to romp with us. But he was the most expressive dog I have ever known, he seemed to have emotions too. He always knew when we were going on a long trip. He would lay on the porch and mope. I am serious, you can see it in his face, he would walk around with his head down, and only half wag his tail when we talked to him. He sometimes looked so pathetic when it was rainy, cold or during a thunderstorm.

Oreo was always around when we were outside (unless we were shooting the guns) he would lay on the ground with us, play in the yard, let us drag him around in our games, chase him around for fun, go running or go on long rambles...always the companion, always the friend. He was always there, guarding his flock. There was almost never a time that I stepped out the door that he wasn't there to greet me...
He was a little sneaky too though. Oreo was the perfect gentleman...as long as a person was watching. If he was given scraps he would always wait very politely while the cats ate, but whenever he thought you were gone he would push them out of the way and eat the rest of it! As soon as you appeared again he sat down and waited.
Cute, sweet, gentle, goofy, pathetic, beautiful, happy, loving, faithful, special...that hardly even begins to describe our dog.

For almost the past ten years he's been with our family. He would let the cats curl up around his feet, he would catch a chicken for us with his paw or mouth but never hurt them, he'd try to do tricks for food. Though unfixed, he thought the whole world was his friend and he didn't act like he had any property rights. He never really wandered anywhere, he always stayed close to us. But I guess the fact that we lived half a mile off the road helped.
A lady once came to our house who used to breed and raise Australian Shepherds. She told us that she didn't know why somebody ever dumped him...Oreo was a perfect specimen of the Australian Shepherd breed except that his eyes were brown instead of blue. But then, I always liked brown-eyed dogs better... He really was beautiful. I would look at magazines about Aussies, and most of them were not nearly as pretty as he was. I was proud of him...he has been a part of our family for so long...and I love him.

Well we moved about a year ago...and we live right on the highway. We worried about Oreo, because he wasn't afraid of cars. This last Tuesday I was sitting at the computer as Mom and my siblings put dinner on the table. Dad came in, gathered us all and said he had some sad news. "Oreo was just out on the highway...he was run over by a truck...and he's gone." Everything that happened that evening is a blur, a dream, surreal...yet it is all crystal clear at the same time...and I'll never forget it.

We ran to him, we sat beside him, cried, and stroked him. He couldn't be gone...it wasn't real...it seemed he had always been there. Oh, it hurt...a lot. I didn't want to let him go. Greg, Jess and I, we sat for a long time, struggling with the reality of it. Jessica later said, "Heather and I cried while we petted him, and Greg rubbed his belly like he always did. Heather, Greg and I were the ones who took it hardest when Ruth died, and probably this time too. We waited 'til Monica got home to bury him, and by that time it was dark. But seeing Oreo on the ground was the hardest. You can't know what it's like until you have experienced it. It's awful!!!" I couldn't leave him, I couldn't let him lay there on the grass all alone. I stayed there...two hours I think, mourning, struggling, and waiting 'til Monica got home. We put him beside Ruth, just inside the grove, and we told him goodbye...

Every time I drive into the driveway, or step out the door, or even if I'm sitting in my room I get a lump in my throat realizing he's not there. Part of me can't believe it really happened. Part of me says it had to be a dream, but yet I know it was true...because there is a pile of dirt, his collar on the table......and he doesn't come to the door every time I go outside...

I guess Jessica said it well when she said, "God brought Oreo to us as a stray, to love and care for. When He did this He gave us a piece of His creation that was wonderful. It was a blessing having Oreo with us and there can never be another dog that will replace him. I just have to remember him as he was, not as he is, and thank God for this wonderful blessing, and for the time that we had him."

Reasons to not send children to Government schools...

2009-08-08T18:46:00.000-07:00

This is from an article by Dr. Voddie Baucham. I have read it, and it is excellently written!

Top five reasons not to send your children to Government schools:

5. You don't have to.

4. America's schools are among the worst in the industrialized world.

3. America's schools are morally repugnant.

2. Government education is anti-Christian.

1. The Bible commands Christ-centered education.

to read the full article go here.

Quilt giveaway...

2009-07-27T11:54:00.000-07:00

this is a giveaway for a beautiful quilt from Marie_Madeline Studio. So I'm posting about it because I'd like a chance to win. For some reason I couldn't get a picture on here. But go check it out here

A "deep" thought...

2009-07-24T06:39:00.000-07:00

"Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic."

Brokenness...

2009-07-05T16:24:00.000-07:00

"The sacrifice You desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God." ~Psalm 51:17

"Have mercy on me, O God, because of Your unfailing love. Because of Your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins. Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin. For I recognize my rebellion; it haunts me day and night. Against You, and You alone, have I sinned; I have done what is evil in Your sight. You will be proved right in what You say, and Your judgment against me will prove just." ~Psalm 51:1-4

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Brokenness itself can be a divine moment with God. Brokenness comes most often through circumstances that overwhelm you or sin that reduces you to the point where you realize that the only way out of your mess is by God's help. It is a feeling of hitting bottom and realizing your complete dependence on God. Brokenness also comes as you grow in the awareness of God's holiness in contrast to your own sinfulness. It signifies the breaking point of your pride and self-sufficiency and becomes a turning point in your life. It is the moment when you release control of your life into God's loving hands. When you are brokenhearted about sin in your life, God promises to draw close to you, heal your self-inflicted wounds, and restore you to Himself.

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Divine Promise
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues
those whose spirits are crushed." ~Psalm 34:18

So I read this in a book a friend just gave my brother and it set me to thinking. I was thinking about this, and thinking about how much brokenness it might take for me to truly be broken. How often do we, I, reach a point of brokenness which is only a beginning point in God's process, but in my pride I say "This is it! God is breaking me! I am being humble and now I am being restored!" How often I think of what God should give me, do for me, show me, because somehow I claim to deserve it. Yet I do not remember that though I have access to His Presence as Christ did it is only because of what Christ did. What have I that is of any worth to lay at His feet and say this is my reason for doing things my way? Nothing. The only thing I can lay at His feet is my sin and pride and transgression, and there is no reason in the world that I could have to ask Him to place any value in that when He has already told me that it is foul and abhorrent to Him. Every time I grow, through God's work in me...not my own, He gives me just a glimpse of how much more He is that I have absolutely nothing to compare to. His is everything and I am nothing. He is everything to me, everything that I can never be. And yet, with sorrow and patience, He will again and again reach down and extend His hand to me to pick me up and draw me back to Him. How amazing is His love, even when He is breaking me.

Ye Shall Know

2009-07-05T16:17:00.000-07:00

"Ye know not what the Lord is working out of this, but ye shall know it hereafter."

-Samuel Rutherford

Can we really fathom it?

2009-06-19T17:46:00.000-07:00

Psalm 136

¹Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
²Give thanks to the God of gods,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
³Give thanks to the Lord of lords,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
⁴To Him who alone does great wonders,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting;
⁵To Him who made the heavens with skill,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting;
⁶To Him who spread out the earth above the waters,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting;
⁷To Him who made the great lights,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting:
⁸The sun to rule by day,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
⁹The moon and stars to rule by night,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
¹⁰To Him who smote the Egyptians in their firstborn,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
¹¹And brought Israel out from their midst,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
¹²With a strong hand and an outstretched arm,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
¹³To Him who divided the Red Sea asunder,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
¹⁴And made Israel pass through the midst of it,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting;
¹⁵But He overthrew Pharaoh and his army in the Red Sea,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
¹⁶To Him who led His people through the wilderness,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting;
¹⁷To Him who smote great kings,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
¹⁸And slew mighty kings,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting:
¹⁹Sihon, king of the Amorites,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
²⁰And Og, king of Bashan,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
²¹And gave their land as a heritage,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
²²Even a heritage to Israel His servant,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
²³Who remembered us in our low estate,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting,
²⁴And has rescued us from our adversaries,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting;
²⁵Who gives food to all flesh,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.
²⁶Give thanks to the God of heaven,
For His lovingkindness is everlasting.

Eternity is an unfathomable concept for me. No matter how hard I try I can't wrap my brain around the idea...it just doesn't work. To go on forever doesn't make sense to me...I can sort of understand not ending...but always just being...and yet God's lovingkindness is eternal. How great it must be, and yet I still cannot truly value it because it doesn't make sense to me. How He must love me though, as messed up as I am, to be that tender and gracious to me!

After the serious post...

2009-06-17T18:44:00.001-07:00

I decided to add some fun pictures of the Eagle Scout!

Yep, there are the Eagles...they make some of the wackiest faces!

Stifling a grin?

He can't beat me up! lol, actually he says I beat up on him :D

Somehow we all managed to look weird in this picture

Terror at the thought of losing his hat. (it was just taken away for the sake of the pictures)

Hmm...that looks mischievous and dangerous

and now, handsome, intelligent, courageous, diligent, humble, godly, loyal and cheerful...
my wonderful brothers!

him of whom I am so proud...

2009-06-17T17:34:00.000-07:00

my wonderful, godly, humble, diligent, gentlemanly, gracious (and more, much much more!) brother Gregory! The Sunday after my graduation we celebrated his Boy Scout Eagle Court of Honor. Greg actually got his eagle at fourteen (I think, or maybe just after he turned 15) but was unable to celebrate until now. He has worked very, very hard to achieve this rank. Only about2% of Boy Scouts ever attain the Eagle rank! That's pretty small. Also the NESA (National Eagle Scout Association) is the only mens organization in the U.S. in which one has to have done something while a boy to be a member. So anyway, I want to post pictures of his wonderful and very memorable occasion!! :D (partly an inside joke that)

Master of Ceremonies, Mr. McBride and Assistant Scout Master, Mr. Silvey

Pledge of allegiance

Scout Oath and Law

The five Eagle Scouts at the court of honor (Matt Reinkemeyer, Pastor Bowen, Luke Storer, Robert and Grandean)

They received the honor of escorting Greg to his chair

Lighting the candles for each of the points of the scout law, along with Scripture verses for each.

Robert, older brother and Eagle Scout, gave the Eagle Charge

and delivered the Eagle Promise to Greg, once Greg had made this promise he became an Eagle Scout.

The brothers and Eagles

Greg now gives receives his certificate, medal, etc.

Mom pins on his medal

and receives her Eagle Mom pin
Dad gave him his certificate and received his pin as well. (I don't remember which one gave him his patch... (which, btw, was on the next day! That's the one badge that scouts don't dally about putting on their shirts!)

His Eagle medal
Mentor Pin goes to Mr. Stan Inman! He was shocked and so blessed!

Mr. McBride and Greg

Talking to Greg

No, they weren't straight-faced the whole time. Far from it!

Eagle Scout's remarks...he made a comment which had Dad absolutely rolling with laughter!
Brendan from the color guard preparing to retire colors

This picture is so cool...Mr. Schnell, Mr. McBride and Mr. Silvery saluting the American flag.
I honestly don't deserve the blessings the Lord has given me through my family, but I really don't deserve this brother. He and I have had our problems through the years, some of which came to violence (ask about that later), and we've had a lot of struggles in our relationship. But he and I have both grown in the Lord and I can honestly say that Gregory is a man now, and I'm excited to see what the Lord is going to do with him.
Congratulations Eagle Scout! I love you bro!

Because of the event I wanted family photos...

2009-06-15T12:05:00.000-07:00

and I love to show off my wonderful family! So here are some of the pictures and I wanted to share them with you.
(Oh, btw, if anyone would like to read my comments or anything just leave me a comment and let me know. I don't think they're a big deal, but some people might want to read them.)

The family

Goofy family

More interesting family :D

Me with Mom and Dad

Me with my amazing big brother!

My wonderful big sister!

My "big" little brother (Greg)

Another brother (Brendan)

My dear younger sister (Jessica)

My littlest brother (for some reason we did
not get any pictures of Anthony with me)

And my dear sweet baby sister (Julia)

Since I'm official now and people want pictures...

2009-06-14T18:37:00.000-07:00

Here are a few photos from my graduation. Yes, there will be more coming!

The Principal's Remarks (Daddy)

The Teacher's Remarks (Mom)

Big Brother's Remarks (Robert)

Awards (Monica)

Awards (Greg), there were more...

Graduate's Remarks (me :P )

Song by Rachel Robb, it was beautiful, btw

About to recieve diploma

Receiving Diploma

Afterward!!

I am blessed beyond what I deserve...

2009-05-24T14:36:00.001-07:00

This is the most beautiful, wonderful, godly young woman I know. So many times, still, I don't value her and her friendship as I should. So often I am cutting, short and rude to her...yet she still loves me. I have been so blessed to receive such a wonderful sister from the Lord. I ask Him to make me more worthy of her sisterhood and that He would cause our relationship to continue to strengthen in the years ahead. I think God knew I needed an older sister. That's why He gave me one of them!

S.B. 291...

2009-05-15T16:10:00.000-07:00

For those of you who know about this I thought I would give you a link to Nienna's blog so you can read about what happened yesterday, and what it means. Yes, the amendment was passed, and the House and Senate in Jeff City both passed the bill! The link if you want to read is here
Maybe I can post a couple pictures of the turnout. There were a LOT of homeschoolers there!