You Are Loved...

I was chatting with my dear sisters (and sister-in-law who counts as a sister) recently and our conversation, along with previous thoughts of mine, have gotten me rolling steadily on a mental track that has resurfaced in my mind from time to time already. We were talking about fears, struggles, insecurities, relational difficulties with other people and the like.
I know that I, for one, place a lot of weight upon how I present myself to other people and the reputation that I have. So yes, what they think about me. Most of the time I don't care if they want to be my best friends or not, I just want to prove myself, to be as much as I can, to give evidence of maturity in my life choices, to be seen as responsible, hard-working, to be looked up to and respected. But not just those things, because I want those to be seen as the fruits of what lies underneath. I want to reflect Christ in the day-to-day, and that when they think of me they think of an honorable young woman who is trying to serve the Lord, a Christian who is striving to live her daily life in accordance with the Scripture. And when I hear reports otherwise, possibly through the gossip chain, directly from the quoter, or concerns from a well-meaning friend then it bothers me. It really, really bothers me... Actually it hurts...

So I mull over it, review behaviors, listen to old mental audio, question and cross-question everything. It's painful, yet at the same time as I may initially not believe it I always do a mental rehash to try to figure out how much truth was in what was said or they believed, and where I really am messing up. I always want to make things better, and I usually come at it from the approach that if something was wrong, was off, that it was my fault at least in part and I can fix it and improve that other person's view by my actions. But that doesn't always happen. I can try as hard as I want, improve drastically and perhaps I'm doing really well, and still my reputation in their eyes may not have changed at all. Ouch. I don't know about you but I know that I doubt myself a lot. I question my value and quality of character. Just how valuable I am at large, how positive an influence I really am, how clear a reflection I really make. I know life is not about what other people think of us, nor should we live for praise and affirmation. But when I don't get feedback in the positive then I begin to doubt how much of the positive is really there. This has often been a source of trouble for me because I know in my head the way things should be but I have temptations and fears that try to pull me down. My friends and family have reminded me that it doesn't matter what everyone in the world wants to think of me. I need to value the opinions of my family, friends and mentors, and listen to the things they have to say. Yes, I can make notes of the concerns other people have, but sometimes there are people in this world who are not going to understand you, who are going to dislike you or think the worst of you... and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it! But it doesn't necessarily reflect the truth, and they likely don't really know at all where you're coming from. Still, it's hard for me. I'm a pleaser and a fixer, and when things aren't good it rubs like an abrasion.

And yet I know there is more, and always two sides to the issue, and along with the challenges and struggles we were talking about we also shared encouragements and reminders. So I want to share them with you. So often, even as believers, we are caught up in the world and other peoples' opinions and we lose focus on the ultimate truth of what God says. It does matter that we seek to live our lives for Christ, to be reflections of His truth and live honorably in the day-to-day. But in the end it is the Lord's opinion and truth that matters and our hearts to serve Him, not whether all the people around us think we are the best. And our Savior speaks ultimate truth to us through His Word that we need to believe. God loves us, He loves us the way He designed us to be and He loves us the way we are. Mind, I'm not saying He loves everything about the way we are, because when we sin we grieve Him greatly, but He loves us just as we are, even though we are. The Lord looks at us, His redeemed children, and we are pure in His eyes, and lovely. Can you imagine? He designed us with His own hands, formed our beings and breathed life into each one. He created each and every one of us exactly like ourselves only, no two alike, unique, special and reflecting His glory. We feel worthless and He tells us that we are valuable and the most treasured part of His creation. We fear and worry and He offers us the confidence and boldness to face anything in the world through Him. When we feel the weakest He can show us the most strength. We get lost in turmoil of unknowns and confusion of life and decisions and yet He declares His peace. When we're in pain, hurting and crying out He comforts and loves us in perfection. And in the midst of the hardest trials it's His gift of perseverance that gets us through. I doubt my abilities and character, I am afraid of my failings, I hurt at the negative opinions of others and I get tangled and lost in my own quirks and problems. But He loves me. He loves me! And He loves you! And you are a precious gem, made in His image, valuable and special. Hear that truth, friends. Hear it and be encouraged and rejuvenated. That truth floods my soul and swells my heart full to bursting with His awesomeness. In the midst of my biggest problems I see His greatest light, and it's absolutely glorious that He loves me as I am, who I am, He created me and when He looks at me He is delighted and pleased. There is no greater feeling in this world than to know that your Maker, your Creator and Savior looks at you with perfect love and eyes seeing infinite value. Lift your head high, wipe the tears from your eyes and stand in the Lord's truth. His truth never changes, don't let the lies and ideas of the world bring you down. Live, laugh and feel the joy of life because you are loved!!!